


You Are Bound To Go

by ShyAudacity



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Archie Andrews Needs a Hug, Bisexual Archie Andrews, Foster Care, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Jughead Jones Needs a Hug, M/M, No Black Hood, Road Trips, Secrets, This starts out in there junior year, idk how to tag this in a way that wont give it away shit, just pretend that seasons two and three havent happened okay? okay, magical abilities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-09
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-10-07 12:00:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17365535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShyAudacity/pseuds/ShyAudacity
Summary: “You really didn’t have to come all the way over here, Jug. We could have done this another day- or just later in the day, even.”Jughead looks at him likes he’s grown another head. “That would defeat the purpose of watching a marathon of Halloween movies, Archie. What’s the matter with you? Are you feeling okay?”I wanna ask you the same thing,Archie thinks to himself.Do you even know what’s coming? Do you know that you’re doomed?ORArchie has the ability to see what age anyone will die at. Jughead’s number has been stuck at seventeen for as long as Archie can remember.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really excited to share this but also nervous ahhh. I hope you like it!
> 
> Unbeta'd and title from Dad Bought A Telescope by Kevin Kantor.

Archie doesn’t remember when his ability showed up, maybe it’s always been there, maybe he acquired it somehow. He’s not really sure.

It didn’t make much sense at first. For the longest time, he thought that everyone saw it; the bright, blue numbers hovering over everyone’s chest like a literal walking time bomb. As a kid, Archie thought the numbers just showed everyone’s ages. Then, he realized he was wrong when all of his friends starting turning seven, eight, nine and none of their numbers changed, not once.

When he was ten, his grandma Bunny passed away and the sixty-eight on her chest turned black right before his eyes and Archie finally put the pieces together about the numbers. The numbers mean that’s the age of which you’ll die. This ability of his isn’t a blessing, it’s an absolute curse.

The worst part? Jughead’s number has been stuck at seventeen for as long as Archie can remember. It’s never changed, not even once.

It doesn’t dawn on Archie how _close_ Jughead is to dying until the night of his seventeenth birthday when they’re all sitting at Pop’s, enjoying some burgers. He realizes, then, like a kick in the face that they only have _a year_ left together, give or take. As much as Archie doesn’t want to think about it, it’s all that he can seem to do when Jughead’s around now. In some sick way, he almost wishes that he knew _how_ Jughead would die; maybe then he could do something to stop it. Maybe he could save him.

Last year, when his dad got shot, everyone was amazed at Archie for being able to keep such a level head through the whole thing, even when it looked grim. He didn’t tell any of them the truth about what he can see or about his Dad’s fate. Fred’s number has been stuck at seventy-three since Archie was a kid, he wasn’t the least bit worried about losing him, at least not that day. But he didn’t tell anyone that.

He’s never told anyone.

Until now, at least.


	2. October

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey, we’re still doing our Halloween movie marathon on Wednesday, right?”
> 
> An anxious feeling settles in Archie’s gut, he tries not to sound panicked as he asks, “Of course we are, why wouldn’t we?”
> 
> Jughead holds a hand up, “Just double checking, plans have a tendency to change on us, that’s all.”
> 
> “Right, right, sure. Yeah, we’re still good for movie day.” He tries to play off his nervousness with a laugh, ignoring Jughead’s gaze.
> 
> One of these days he’s going to slip up and say something he hadn’t meant to like _are you sure you’re feeling okay because the number on your chest says otherwise._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy crap! Thank you so much for all the love I got on the first chapter! It means the absolute world to me! Just as well, a big shoutout to my friend Alanna, jimalim on tumblr, for offering to Beta for me! You're the best, really. I hope you guys like this next chapter!

**October 27th** :

Pop’s Chock lit Shoppe is decked out in Halloween decorations. Black and orange streamers hang from the ceiling. The napkins dispensers have been refilled; instead of the basic white ones, they’ve been restocked with ones covered in candy corns. It’s a bit over the top, and cheesy, sure, but Archie loves it. He looks forward to seeing it every year.

“Do you think I can use my Dad going to jail as an example of facing adversity?” Veronica asks, her hand is stilled over her notebook.

Archie looks up just in time to see Jughead’s unamused reaction and has to stifle a laugh. Their English teacher had assigned practice essays for college applications as homework and all of the teens were still struggling to find something to write about.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me, Jughead.” She says from next to him. “You can’t act like you weren’t thinking the same thing.”   

“Only difference is that my dad _stayed_ in jail. At least yours got to leave.”

Jughead’s tone goes bitter and Archie’s gaze drops to the blue numbers on his chest and the sick feeling in his stomach returns all over again.

Jughead’s birthday was only a couple of weeks ago and Archie has been on edge ever since. Now, every time the phone rings Archie starts to panic. His brain saying _is this it, is this one where someone tells me that Jughead is never coming back?_

Jughead interrupts his thoughts, saying “You know, Arch, if you wanted to take a picture all you had to do was ask. Lasts longer than staring a hole into my forehead.”

Archie coughs away his embarrassment and sits up a little straighter; both Betty and Veronica laugh half-heartedly.

If only they knew the whole story.

“Can I get you guys anything else?” Their server asks- Jessica, her name tag reads.   

“Some more Diet Coke would be fabulous, thank you,” Veronica says. She pushes the glass forward without even looking up.

Archie watches quietly as the girl pours Veronica a new drink; there’s a sad, lost look on her face. The _twenty-two_ floating just in front of her name tag makes his heart sink, Jessica can’t be much younger than that now. Her dark, wavy ponytail swings behind her as she walks away from the table and behind the counter again.

Archie wishes that there was a better way to help people- the ones who are suffering silently, specifically- but then, always has to remind himself _you can’t save everyone, not when they’ve already made up their minds._

Shaking the thought out of his head, Archie looks back to his essay, trying to remember where he left off.

“Ah, crap,” Betty says, from his left, “I’m supposed to be home in ten minutes, I gotta get out of here. V, are you-”

“Still coming over? Of course. Don’t worry I’ve got our driver on speed dial, he’ll be here in two.”

“Thank god,” she says, dropping a couple of bills for her milkshake and fries, “We’ll see you at school, bye guys.”

Both Archie and Jughead toss back a _see ya later_ as the girls walk out of the diner. They sit in silence for a few minutes before Jughead drops his pen and looks up at Archie.

“Hey, we’re still doing our Halloween movie marathon on Wednesday, right?”

An anxious feeling settles in Archie’s gut, he tries not to sound panicked as he asks, “Of course we are, why wouldn’t we?”

Jughead holds a hand up, “Just double checking, plans have a tendency to change on us, that’s all.”

“Right, right, sure. Yeah, we’re still good for movie day.” He tries to play off his nervousness with a laugh, ignoring Jughead’s gaze.

One of these days he’s going to slip up and say something he hadn’t meant to like _are you sure you’re feeling okay because the number on your chest says otherwise._ Or even _I know I’m overreacting but that’s just because I really like you Jug and don’t know how to say it without sounding like a complete loser._ Once that happens there will be no taking it back, much to Archie’s dismay.

He just _had_ to fall for his best friend, the same one who’s apparently _dying_ , too. What are the odds.

“I should probably get going, too. Claire doesn’t like it when I miss dinner. She keeps telling me I need to put some meat on these bones.”

Jughead’s been staying with a foster family, the Welch’s, on the southside since FP was arrested last year. The Welch’s are good people, sure, but Archie can tell living with them isn’t his favorite thing; he’d rather be in Toledo with his Mom and sister, or back at his place, even.

“You look fine, Jughead.”

“Yeah, I know,” he says with a smug wink, “See you tomorrow?”

“Y-Yeah, sure. See you later.”

Archie watches Jughead slide out of the booth, then out of the diner. As he walks away, Archie wonders to himself what he’s going to do someday when the boy he loves leaves _for good._

///

**October 30 th:**

Archie is studying for his upcoming English test over The Great Gatsby when his phone buzzes next to him on his desk. It’s a text from Jughead.

**_Jughead_ ** _: I can’t wait for our date tomorrow_

It’s followed by two emoji’s, the heart eyes and the laughing face with the tongue sticking out. For a split second, Archie worries that his heart might actually stop beating for good. His phone buzzes again in his hand, another text coming in.

**_Jughead_** _: Lol no homo dude_ 😉

Archie sighs deeply then rolls his eyes; for a minute there, he was worried that Jughead actually _knew_.

He’s had a crush on Jughead for as long as he can remember, maybe even before the numbers showed up. As a kid, Archie thought that everyone felt this way towards their friends. Thought it was completely normal to be affectionate with them, even hug and kiss at times. But, as he grew, he realized that that wasn’t the case. Archie wasn’t like other boys his age, and he was terrified.

He finally told his dad over the summer, one morning while they were having breakfast at Pop’s. Archie told his dad how he liked boys the same way he liked girls. He’d been more than one kind of terrified, but Fred had just smiled at him.

_“That’s just fine, Arch,”_ Fred told him, _“As long as you’re kind to others- as long as you’re happy, it doesn’t matter to me who you love.”_

And he considered, for a minute, telling his Dad about the numbers, telling about what he can see. He chickened out at the last minute though, decided that maybe telling his dad should wait for another day. Why risk the chance of ruining a good moment, right?

He hasn’t told anyone else about his sexuality- or his crush on Jughead for that matter- not even his friends. Archie’s not ashamed or anything, just afraid. He’s seen how secrets can spread like wildfire in a town like Riverdale; he doesn’t think he’d ever be able to show his face again if this news got out before he was ready for the world to know.

His thumbs hover over the small keyboard before he finally sends back:

**_Archie_ ** _: haha whatever._

It’s not what he wants to say, not by a long shot, but it’s the best he’s got right now. Archie’s phone buzzes again before he’s even looked away; Jughead must be avoiding doing his homework again.

**_Jughead_ ** _: shut up Andrews, you love me and you know it_

_I do,_ Archie thinks to himself, _I really do. That’s the worst part about all of this. Love had to go and get in the way… that bastard._  

///

**October 31 st:   **

By some shred of luck, Halloween falls on the first snow day of the year. Nearly four inches worth of snow coats the ground outside and Jughead _still_ trudges eight blocks from his foster parent’s house over to Archie’s at nine in the morning so they can get an early start on movies.

“You really didn’t have to come all the way over here, Jug. We could have done this another day- or just later in the day, even.”

Jughead looks at him likes he’s grown another head. “That would defeat the purpose of watching a marathon of Halloween movies, Archie. What’s the matter with you? Are you feeling okay?”

_I wanna ask you the same thing,_ Archie thinks to himself _. Do you even know what’s coming? Do you know that you’re doomed?_

Archie just laughs it off. “Whatever, dude. What are we starting with- Hocus Pocus or Scream?”

Jughead throws a hand over his heart in mock pain, “The fact that Beetlejuice wasn’t one of the first two options is _insulting, Archibald_.”

He shakes his head, rolling his eyes before moving towards their DVD cabinet; Jughead really is something else, most days.

More often than not, Archie has the bad habit of talking during movies, but today he’s notably quieter than usual during the movie marathon. He tunes out half of the time, doesn’t even pay attention to the movies and just watches Jughead, trying to think of something that he can do to stop this big, horrible thing from happening.

_I’d tell you if I didn’t think that you would never speak to me again afterward. Maybe I can find a way to get someone else to tell you, or maybe you’ll figure it out all on your own somehow. God, I hope you’re not planning anything I don’t know about. Then again, I don’t know what’s going on inside your head. What if this is all just in my head?_

_What if I’m wrong? What if nothing bad is going to happen after all?_

Jughead catches him staring eventually, during the middle of the first Halloweentown film.

“What?”

“Huh- uh, nothing- just spacing out. That’s all.”

He makes a funny face but doesn’t say anything about Archie’s odd behavior thank god. He’s not sure how he would have explained that one if Jughead had pressed him for details.

Later, three bags of popcorn, two ‘everything but the kitchen sink’ sundaes each, and four movies deep, Fred comes home. He’s stunned by the sight in front of him.

“Have you two been sittin’ here all day?”

“Yeah.” Both Archie and Jughead answer, not looking away from the TV.

“Sheesh,” Fred grumbles under his breath, shaking his head as he walks into the kitchen.

Jughead’s phone goes off on the table, lighting up with a text notification. He only glances at it for a second before getting up with a small sigh.

“Foster parents?”

“Yeah, I’ve been here long enough anyway, don’t wanna bother you guys anymore.”

“What? No way- you’re not a bother at all. You sure you don’t wanna stay for dinner?”

“Hm, tempting, but Claire’s making Pot Roast. I hate to say it, but she gives Pop’s a run for its money. I think I’ll pass, but thanks, though.”

“Alright, you sure you don’t need a ride or something’?”

“Arch, it’s a fifteen-minute walk,” Jughead reminds him, “I could do this in my sleep, I’m pretty sure I have more than once. I’ll be fine, I promise.”

_That’s what everyone says in the movies right before things go to shit._

“Okay, whatever you say, Jug.”

Jughead smiles at him, pats him on the shoulder right before he leaves and Archie feels the skin where Jughead touched him tingle even well after he’s gone.

He really is totally and royally, _fucked_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the process of writing this chapter, I learned that my computer does in fact know how to make certain emoji's, how quaint. See you soon for the next chapter, have a great day!


	3. November

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Betty and Archie are at Pop’s doing some last minute cramming when out of nowhere she asks:
> 
> “What’s going on with you?”
> 
> Archie looks up at her from his calc notes, he has a test tomorrow and if he doesn’t get at least a C then he’s going to fail for the semester.
> 
> “Wh- nothing.” He supplies. “Why?”
> 
> “I don’t know you just- you’ve been really guarded lately. You seem more skittish than usual the last couple of weeks- and it’s not just me, Jug has noticed too.”
> 
> A pit forms in Archie’s stomach. “He has?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what to say about this chapter so I'm just gonna let you read it.
> 
> Edit: I renamed Polly's babies. Sue me.

**November 13th:**

Betty and Archie are at Pop’s doing some last minute cramming when out of nowhere she asks:

“What’s going on with you?”

Archie looks up at her from his calc notes, he has a test tomorrow and if he doesn’t get at least a C then he’s going to fail for the semester.

“Wh- nothing.” He supplies. “Why?”

“I don’t know you just- you’ve been really guarded lately. You seem more skittish than usual the last couple of weeks- and it’s not just me, Jug has noticed too.”

A pit forms in Archie’s stomach. “He has?”

“Of course he has, we’re your best friends. So what is it? Why do you keep pulling away from us?”

Archie blanches, trying to think of something to say that won’t make her laugh at him.

He can’t tell her. What if she tells Jughead? What if she tells everyone? He’ll never be able to live this down. Half of this town already thinks that he’s an idiot jock more often than not, Archie doesn’t need to give them another reason to believe that he’s crazy, too.

In a moment of distraction, Archie’s eyes fall to the blue _thirty-two_ hovering over Betty’s chest, taunting him.

_Wait- has the number always been that low? How have I never noticed till now?_

“Arch? Are you even listening to me right now?” Betty asks, frustrated.  

“No- I mean, yes, I was, I just- sorry. I just remembered that I have to help my dad with something, at home. I gotta go, Betty.”

“What about the test?”

“It’s fine, I can study later,” Archie says, rushing to pack his things, “I’ll see you at school.”

He slings his bag over his shoulder, all but running away from Betty and Pop’s itself. He doesn’t look back even once. Archie keeps a fast pace as he walks home.

_She’s going to figure it out. Betty’s going to know. She already thinks that something’s up with me, it won’t be much longer until she figures this out. Maybe I should just tell her, maybe she won’t even care. Then again, maybe she’ll think I’m crazy._

_Maybe I am._

Archie’s so distracted that Vegas nearly knocks him over when he comes in the front door.

“Whoa- hey, hey, Vegas.” He says, rubbing his hands over the dog’s ears and neck. Archie looks up to see his dad coming out of the kitchen, wiping his hands with a towel.

“Hey, bud.” Fred says, “I thought you were studying with Betty.”

“Change of plans, she had to help her mom with something down at the register. I’ll just study for the test on my own.”

Archie’s never liked lying, wasn’t very good at it as a kid. He’s gotten better at it over the years. For a while, it seemed like lying was just part of getting older, a weird form of initiation into growing up. But the one thing he’s never liked about getting older: lying to his dad. That one hurts every time, makes him feel sick. Somehow, though, he continues to find himself in a place where lying is the only way out without also landing him in hot water.   

“Alright, dinner will be ready in an hour if you’re up for it.”

Vegas stays glued to Archie’s heel as he goes up to his room. He drops his bag into his desk chair, then flops down onto his bed with a sigh.

He has a sick, ominous feeling that if he doesn’t figure out this _Jughead’s going to kick the bucket and one else knows_ problem soon, then life might just go ahead and figure it out for him.

_I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up without ruining everything._

It’s seven o’clock when Jughead lets himself in through Archie’s bedroom window. He nearly falls on his face as he rolls into the room and Archie almost has a heart attack out of surprise.

Archie looks up at him from his bed as Jughead straightens out his beanie. “One of these days you’re gonna hurt yourself on that thing.”   

Jughead makes a _pfft_ sound. “I’ve been doing this for years, you underestimate my abilities, Archie.”

Archie has a sudden, flashing thought of Jughead falling off the rickety, wooden ladder- falling to his death when no one’s around to help. Just the idea of it makes him feel like he could swallow his own tongue.

“What’s up? Betty said you ran out while you guys were studying, made it sound like you were upset about something.”

He panics, “She did?”

“Yeah, and based on the freaked out look on your face I’m guessing she’s right. So what is it?”

 _I can’t tell him,_ Archie thinks to himself, _I can’t ruin everything for him. Not yet._ He sputters, then lies again.

“It’s nothing, really. I just need to get a good grade on this test or I’m never going to pass Ms. Dillon’s class, that’s all.”

“Why didn’t you just say something earlier then? Scoot over, I’ll help you study.”

Archie and Jughead sit facing each other on his bed, legs crossed and knees touching; the entire time Archie feels like his heart is going to beat out of his chest.

_Moments like this, this is what I’ll miss the most. Just being here with him. It’s like nothing else matters._

Jughead nudges him with his knee after a long stretch of quiet.

“Are you sure there’s nothing going on?”

“ _Jug_.”

“I’m just trying to cover all the bases here- that’s it. Not to sound like a complete cliché, but you know you can talk to me about stuff if you need to, right?”

Archie taps his fingers on his leg nervously, avoiding Jughead’s gaze. “No, yeah, I know… it’s just- this isn’t really-.”

He’s interrupted by Fred pushing open the door; impeccable timing, it seems.

“Hey, Arch, how’s the studying coming?”

“Uh, good. I think I’ll get at least a B on the test.”

“Good, I’m glad to hear it. I’ll leave you alone now, I was just coming to say goodnight- oh, and Jughead?”

Jughead, who’s back has been facing the door this entire time, cautiously asks, “Yeah?”

“Next time, kiddo, just use the front door. The last thing we need is you getting hurt on that damn ladder.”

Fred leaves without another word, and both of the boys burst into a fit of giggles after he’s gone. This goes on for a while before Archie finally looks at his phone, noticing how late it is. He looks up at Jughead, offering, “Sleepover?” 

After clearing a space on the floor, Archie and Jughead talk for a bit while they’re blowing up the air mattress. The entire time, Archie keeps biting his tongue trying to keep himself from saying something that he’ll regret.

Later, once they’re finally under all the covers and cozy, Archie’s mind is still racing a million miles a minute. A game of _I tell him I tell him not I tell him I tell him not_ is going on in his head.  

“Jug?”

“Yeah?”

He’s thinking, _do I really want to do this? Do I really want to risk fucking up our whole relationship just because of something that might not even be true?_

“Um… thanks, again. For the help.”

“Any time, Arch.” Jughead mumbles, “Now roll over and go to sleep.”

The word _time_ makes Archie’s heart skip a beat. There’s a small, sad voice in the back of his head reminding him that Jughead doesn’t have near as much as he might think he does.

///

**November 17 th: **

On a whim, Archie goes over to Betty’s that weekend and tells her everything. He starts off with his feelings towards Jughead, and as weird as it is to be telling Betty that he’s basically in love with her ex-boyfriend, she doesn’t get upset. She actually seems happy about it; like maybe she knows something that Archie doesn’t. 

Then, he tells her about the numbers, how they’ve always been there and he’s really worried sick about Jughead but doesn’t know what to do. Betty looks at him like he’s out of his mind, but doesn’t tell him that he’s wrong. She paces around her living room after he’s finished, rubbing her hands together as she thinks.

“Okay, well have you told Jughead?”

“Which part?”

“I don’t know, either? Both?”

He shakes his head. “Of course not.”

“Arch, he needs to know.” Betty says, insistently, “I get that you’re not ready to tell him you like him, which is fine. But- if something bad is going to happen we need to get ahead of things, give him a heads up, you know?”

“If I tell him he’ll never talk to me again. I can’t tell him, Betty. With my luck, he’ll just think that I’m insane or laugh in my face.”

“Then why did you tell me?”

Archie gapes at her for a minute before shrugging, saying, “Cause I’ve been holding this in for years and I’m tired of carrying it by myself. Besides, you’re smart, you know how to fix stuff like this.”

She huffs lightly, shaking her head. “I don’t know if this is something we can just fix, Archie. We’re talking about Jughead’s _life_ here. We can’t just lead him on and let him think that everything is fine when _obviously_ , it’s not. I know you don’t want to- but I really think that you should tell him, if not just for Jughead’s sake then for yours. It’s like you said, Arch, you can’t keep holding this in. That’s not going to help anybody.”

He drops her gaze, sighing as he scratches a hand over the back of his head. Much as he hates to admit it, Archie knows that she’s right. He should tell Jughead about his fate- sooner than later, especially.

He just wishes that he knew _how_ exactly.  

///

**November 22 nd: **

Every year for Thanksgiving, Alice Cooper invites Archie and his dad over for dinner.  And every year like clockwork, Archie wishes that his dad would say no.  

“I don’t know why we come over here every year,” he mutters, holding a plate of cookies as they walk up the front steps, “She doesn’t even seem to like us half the time.” 

Fred looks back at him, gaping, “Alice has an odd way of showing her love; it’s just a few hours, Archie, alright?”

Archie resists rolling his eyes as the front door swings open; Alice stands there in all her modern, housewife glory, wearing a brown turtleneck under a festively colored apron. Archie suddenly feels underdressed in his red long-sleeved shirt, maybe he can go home and change when no one is looking.

“Archie, Fred,” Alice says, voice as tight as her smile. “You’ve brought cookies, store bought, no doubt.”

_This is how she shows her love? Really?_

“Happy Thanksgiving to you, too, Alice,” Fred says, as Alice walks away from the door to let them in, he looks back at Archie, mouthing _be nice._

Archie decides right then and there to bite his tongue the entire night.

Over dinner, Alice carries on about some PTA meeting she attended last week and that _this school would fall apart without me honestly_. Archie focuses most of his attention to Polly’s babies sitting at the end of the table; admittedly, Lennon and Camille are pretty cute, he laughs to himself more than once at the way their tiny hands keep missing their mouths, smearing potatoes across their cheeks.

He does everything that he can to not look away from their faces. Archie doesn’t want to see the numbers, not today, not on a couple of babies with their whole lives in front of them. Just the idea of possibly knowing when they’ll die makes Archie feel like he's going to lose his lunch.

At some point, Archie looks up, having realized that Betty has been trying to get his attention; he cocks his head at her. She mouths, your phone.

Carefully, after glancing to make sure his dad isn't looking, Archie digs his phone out of his pocket.

**_Betty_ ** _: Have you told Jughead yet?_

Archie looks up just long enough to glare at her.

**_Archie_ ** _: No_

**_Betty_ ** _: Why not???_

**_Archie_ ** _: Cause we just talked about this like two days ago why are you asking me already_

**_Betty_ ** _: He needs to know Arch! Soon!_

He’s halfway through typing _I’ll tell him eventually just leave it alone_ when he hears a cough then gets a nudge from his dad next to him. Archie looks up at Fred, then over to Alice who’s staring him down from across the table, an eyebrow raised in irritation.

“Uh- sorry, Mrs. Cooper,” he says, shamefully, shifting awkwardly in his seat. Archie looks up at Betty for a second, she mouths _sorry_ back at him, and he just shrugs.

There’s not an easy way to fix this without someone getting hurt, Archie realizes. He’s lost count by now how times he’s wished he wasn’t like this, wished he never had this stupid ability; it’s not like it’s made his life any easier. There’s no joy in waiting around for the people you love to leave, especially when you know that it’s coming.

_I wish I didn't already know what's coming… I wish there was a way to stop it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Betty knows now! Archie and Jughead do homework! Cute babies are cute! Yeah, that's it.


	4. December

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Archie laughs lightly, a smile growing on his face. His heart begins to race, subconsciously.
> 
> “If you really want to then go ahead- but don’t spend money on me just because you feel like you have to, alright?”
> 
> _“Whatever you say, tough guy. Alright. I should go- see you at school tomorrow?”_
> 
> “Yeah, see ya.”
> 
> Archie drops his phone onto the desk, then pushes away from it, rolling across the floor in his chair. He crosses his arms behind his head as he leans back in his chair. It’s undeniable that he’s absolutely smitten.
> 
> _This would be much easier to deal with if I wasn’t so goddamn in love with him._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Archie drops a bomb on Jughead in this one, just so you know.

**December 10th:**

Somehow a phone call with Jughead that started out about homework and finals turns into one complaining about their Chemistry teacher, then turns into a conversation about some new video game both of them have been itching to get. Out of nowhere, Jughead takes a hard-left turn and asks Archie what he wants for Christmas.

“You don’t have to get me anything for Christmas, Jug, you know that. I thought you didn’t even like the holidays.”

_“I don’t,”_ Jughead responds, voice robotic, _“But Claire already has half of the house decorated and keeps badgering Dave about picking out a tree one of these weekends. She’s already got a billion gifts wrapped up for her nieces and nephews- I don’t know. I guess I’m just in the spirit of celebrating this year, even if it feels like I’m suffocating in gift wrap.”_

“Yeah?”

_“Yeah- plus, you’re one of the only ones I actively like in this town, so I might as well get you something.”_

Archie laughs lightly, a smile growing on his face. His heart begins to race, subconsciously.

“If you really want to then go ahead- but don’t spend money on me just because you feel like you have to, alright?”

_“Whatever you say, tough guy. Alright. I should go- see you at school tomorrow?”_

“Yeah, see ya.”

Archie drops his phone onto the desk, then pushes away from it, rolling across the floor in his chair. He crosses his arms behind his head as he leans back in his chair. It’s undeniable that he’s absolutely smitten.

_This would be much easier to deal with if I wasn’t so goddamn in love with him._

///

**December 31 st: **

Finals week comes and goes and Archie just barely skates by without failing any of his classes, thank God. Christmas is the same as always, open presents in the morning, call mom in Chicago, say that they’re going to go to church and then don’t. Then, finish off the night with Chinese food for dinner.

Jughead joins in, just like the last few years. The Welch’s ended up going out of town for the holiday at the last minute and Archie knows that he would rather spend the day with people he actually likes, anyway.

Veronica throws a New Year’s party and Archie spends the first hour of it standing in the corner, nursing his beer. Eventually, Betty walks over and Archie already knows what she’s going to ask.

“Have you told him yet?”

“No,” he mutters, eyes locked on the plastic cup in his hand.

“Archie, we talked about this, you have to tell him, he needs to know.”

“No, you talked and I ignored.”

“ _Arch_.”

“Okay, give me a break, Betty, it’s not like this is easy.”

“I know, I know- sorry. I don’t mean to push.”

Archie mumbles without looking up, “It’s fine.” He knows he needs to tell Jughead, he does. But how could he possibly go up to his best friend and say _hey man you don’t know this but you’re gonna die at some point this year sorry it sucks to suck._

Finally looking up from his cup, Archie sees Jughead walking towards them; odd, Archie didn’t think he’d want to come to a party like this. Betty must see him too because before Archie can say anything else she’s walking away from him. He glares at the back of her head as she walks off.

_Thanks a lot, Betty._

“What was that about?” Jughead asks, noticing the tenseness.

“Hm- oh, nothing, we were just talking about- some stuff.”

“Oh- kay?” Jughead responds, confused and curious. “Do you- do you like Betty?”

Archie gives him a deer in headlights look, “What? No, no I don’t like Betty. I mean, I like Betty, she’s great but I don’t _like_ Betty. Not like that, we’re- we’re just friends. Why do you? Are getting back to-?”

“Easy there, Archie. Betty and I have agreed to be just friends, we work better that way, less codependent.”

“Uh, yeah. Sure.” 

The conversation fizzles out, and Jughead walks off to find the snack table. Unable to think of much else to do, Archie walks into the kitchen and dumps out his beer in the sink. He wasn’t enjoying it much, anyway.

Creepy as it sounds, he spends most of the party watching couples kiss, cuddle, and talk with each other throughout the night. Archie kind of wishes that he was one of them. He wishes that he and Jughead could be one of them, if only they were lucky enough.

He keeps trying to think of a good way to tell Jughead about what he knows. Maybe he can break the news to him easily. Then again, is there an easy way to tell someone that they’re going to die within the next ten months? Probably not.

Midnight comes before he realizes it and nearly everyone is pairing off with someone to kiss- even the people who didn’t come here with anyone. The lights have been dimmed in the living room, Archie can’t imagine how he’d find someone in such low light. Besides, there’s only one person he really _wants_ to kiss.  

Jughead finds him again a few minutes before the ball drop, a look of intent in his eye; it makes Archie’s heart race.

“Hey, I just remembered,” he says, “I forgot to give this to you the other day.”

Jughead pulls his hand out of his pocket, holding a handmade bracelet, braided out of fabric. He has to squint to see it. The colors look familiar, but Archie can’t- no, _no way._

“Oh my god, is that-?”

“The flag from our old tree house? Damn right.” Jughead says, grinning widely. “Do you remember how much time we spent on this thing? We acted like it was a Picasso piece or something.”

Archie and Jughead had spent three days decorating their flag while their dads built the treehouse itself. The flag had to be perfect, had to represent their friendship in every way possible. Their hands had been stained with sharpie for _days_ once they were done with it. The _A_ and _J_ from where they had written their names hang off of the knot at the bottom of the bracelet, literally tying the whole thing.

Archie hasn’t seen this thing in years, but looking at it now- he can feel his whole childhood rush back to him.

“How did you- I thought-?”

“I snagged it from the tree house before we got evicted from our place on eighth street a few years back, that tree house was one of the only good things about that place. I hope you’re not mad that I chopped the flag up, but I wanted it to be special- oh yeah, and I had to get Jellybean to talk me through braiding it together without completely fucking it up.”

They both laugh lightly; Archie can’t bring himself to look away from it.

“If you don’t want it I can-.”

“No,” Archie replies, firmly, “No, I love it, Jughead, really. Will you tie it on me?”

With cold, gentle hands, Jughead takes hold of Archie’s wrist and knots either ends of the bracelet together; it’s a perfect fit. 

“I- It's great, dude, really. Thank you.”

“It’s only fair,” Jughead says with a shrug, “You gave me something that I never take off; figured it was about time I did the same.”

Archie looks up at the hat in admiration. He’d bought it for Jughead when they were kids after Jughead had cracked his head open on the banister while playing a game of tag. One trip to the emergency room and eight stitches later, Archie was gifting him the knit beanie.

_“Look! It’s a crown to protect your crown, Jug!”_ Archie had said, holding it up proudly. That was more than ten years ago and Jughead has worn it nearly every day since then, come to think of it- Archie can’t remember the last time he saw Jughead take it off. Maybe when his father was arrested, if memory serves him correct.

“Do you still have that scar? On your forehead?”

Jughead pushes his hat back just the slightest bit, index finger rubbing over the thin scar right in front of his hairline; it’s barely visible in this light. Archie has to resist the urge to reach out and touch it himself.

The people around him start counting down, and Archie looks down at his phone; less than thirty seconds to midnight.

“I can’t believe the year is already over.” He says, out loud.

“Yeah,” Jughead grumbles next to him, “I wonder if this new year is going to be as shitty as all the rest.”

Archie feels his heart sink, a little voice in the back of his head saying: _tell him. You need to tell him._ He catches Jughead by the wrist before he can walk away.

“Juggie, hey, wait um- I have to tell you something.”

“Okay… what is it?”

Archie’s mouth goes dry; everyone around him is counting down from ten.

Jughead makes a concerned face, “Archie? What is it?”

_Five. Four. Three. Two. One._

“… I’m in love with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ; )


	5. January

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Later, once they’re back home and full of fries and milkshakes, Archie and Jughead are lying on opposite ends of his bed, faced away from each other when Jughead asks out of nowhere, “Do you ever worry about dying?”
> 
> Archie sits up, stiff as a board thinking: _Betty told him. Oh God, he knows he knows he knows shit shit shit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friend, if you don't like cliffhangers then I _would not_ read this right now. The chapter will be up in a few days, I swear. Minors mentions of suicide in this chapter, just a heads up. Also, this first part is the closest I'm ever going to get to writing smut so??? Enjoy, I guess.

**January 1 st:**

“I’m in love with you.”

Archie’s words echo as time slows around them, neither one of them saying a thing. He’s vaguely aware of everyone around him cheering; the sounds of celebration make his skin prickle, the hair on his arms stand on end.

_Holy shit_ , Archie thinks to himself, _I can’t believe I just said that. Crap, I hope he’s not mad at me._

Archie and Jughead just stand there, staring at each other for a long minute before Jughead finally surges forward and kisses him, hands on Archie’s face, pulling him closer. Archie’s hands go to Jughead’s waist out of surprise; this isn’t the reaction he was expecting, but _damn_ is he glad that it’s happening.

All the cheering continues around them and Jughead keeps kissing him; for a minute Archie wonders why he was ever worried in the first place. Then Jughead pulls back, looking at Archie with those bright eyes and his worry comes back at full force, remembering the bright blue number at the bottom of his line of sight.

_What the hell did I just do?_

“We’re going home. Right now.” Jughead says firmly, his hands sliding down to squeeze Archie’s; he’s so caught off guard by the whole moment that Archie just goes with it, nodding.

The two of them walk home hurried and oddly quiet after leaving Veronica’s house, neither one saying a word. Archie can’t help but worry that maybe he upset Jughead somehow because of what he said, then he remembers that _Jughead_ was the one to initiate the kiss and he gets confused all over again.

They creep into the house as quietly as they can, not wanting to wake up Fred. The second that they’re in the sanctity of Archie’s bedroom, Jughead is kissing him again.

Jughead barely waits two seconds before pressing Archie against the door, kissing him with everything that he has. Archie sighs into the kiss as Jughead’s hand find his face again, thumbs rubbing over his jawline. Archie’s own hands go to Jughead’s waist just like before, enjoying the feeling of firm muscles under his hands.

Jughead pulls back from the kiss, resting his forehead against Archie’s and pausing just long enough to say, “Do you even know how fucking long I’ve been waiting for you to say something?”

If at all possible, Archie’s heart starts to beat even faster.

“C’mere,” Archie murmurs, pulling Jughead to his mouth again almost impatiently. The kissing continues; they’re practically electric, Archie feels as though all of his nerve endings are awake at once.

Archie sighs again when Jughead trails his mouth across his cheek, down the column of his throat, over his collarbone, open-mouthed and warm. He pulls at the hem of Jughead’s shirt, tugging until it’s all the way off and then does the same with his own. The wood of the door is cool against his spine.

It’s not until Archie curls a finger into the waist of Jughead’s dark jeans that they slow down.

“Easy, easy, Arch,” Jughead says, lowly as he steps back, “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, alright?”

Archie nods, eyes growing heavy as he nips at Jughead’s shoulder. They stay like that a few minutes more, kissing- just holding each other, really.

Later, lips kiss bitten and worn out, they’re in Archie’s bed- air mattress on the floor made a mockery of. Archie has his head on Jughead’s bare shoulder. If he listens close enough, he can hear Jughead’s heart beating below him.

_How many more days are we going to get exactly like this one? Ten? Two hundred? Was it a mistake ever telling you that I loved you in the first place?_

“What are you thinking about?” Jughead asks quietly, lips brushing Archie’s forehead. He’s got an arm around Archie’s shoulders, fingers moving lightly over the bare skin of his back.

“Wondering why I didn’t do this sooner.”

It’s not a total lie. In reality, though, Archie hates himself for being such a coward. From keeping information from Jughead that could possibly change _everything_.

_Maybe I should have just kept my mouth shut. Maybe I shouldn’t tell him anything at all. Why give him a reason to run away, right?_

///

**January 6 th:**

Betty corners Archie in the hallway on the first day back at school. He’s been avoiding her since Veronica’s party, making up random excuses for not being able to go to the movies or Pop’s- every time that he lies, he feels worse than he already does about the whole thing.

He’s so goddamn tired of lying.

Betty curls a hand around his forearm; her nails are newly manicured, a teal color this time.

“Please tell me you told him.”

“…I told him something.”

“Which was?”

Archie mutters, “That I have feelings for him.”

Betty seems more upset than relieved, despite the good news. “Archie!”

“This isn’t exactly easy for me; do you get that? I can’t just- I can’t just ruin his life by telling him that’s he’s not going to have much of one anymore, that’s not fair. And don’t say that you’ll tell him if I don’t because that’s fucked up, Betty.”

“I won’t, I won't say anything… but I really think you should Archie. Just think about it some more, at least, alright?”

“Think about what?” Jughead says, having come out of nowhere; Archie prays that he hadn’t heard what they were talking about.

“About retaking the ACTs,” Betty says, quick on her feet, “I keep telling Archie that it’ll look good on his school applications.”

Thank God for Betty Cooper, honestly.

“That’s not a big deal,” Jughead says, nudging Archie’s arm. “We can study together, yeah?”

Archie just nods, currently unable to find the words he so desperately needs.

Jughead watches Betty leave over Archie’s shoulder, then drops his voice and asks, “Did you tell her?”

“Tell her?”

“About us. About what we did on New Year’s.”

“Oh, that- no, no I didn’t say anything. Did you want me to?”

Jughead shrugs, reaching for Archie’s hand, “I dunno- I just thought we should talk about it some more before we go and tell everyone.” Jughead’s thumb rubs over his knuckles- first his index, then his middle- and Archie’s mind goes blank.

_Shit, I hadn’t even considered telling anyone- I just assumed he wouldn’t want to._

Jughead pulls him out of his reverie, “Is that okay?”

“Is, what- oh! Yeah, no, no that’s okay- sorry- I’ve uh, got a lot on my mind right now, that’s all.”

“Anything that I can help with?” He asks Archie, a smug grin growing.

_Not unless you want to rethink nearly everything that you’re going to do with the rest of your short life, no._

“Not exactly,” Archie supplies, “but if something comes up, you’ll be the first one to know.”

Per Betty’s advice, he does think about it more- for a whole two seconds while he’s watching Jughead walk off down the hallway- then decides he’s not ready to say anything.

Not _right now,_ at least.

Telling his friends about their new relationship, on the other hand, that’s a different story.

///

**January 20 th:**

Jughead stays over at Archie’s over the long holiday weekend. The Welch’s ended up going out and Jughead hadn’t wanted to come with, so he wasn’t necessarily mad about it.

Sunday, in the afternoon, they meet up with Kevin, Veronica, and Betty at Pop’s. They’re sitting on the same side of the booth when their friends come in; Archie’s knee is bouncing under the table, shaking the entire surface of it. Jughead reaches over and grabs his knee, squeezing in assurance.

“It’s gonna be fine, Arch,” he says, “They’re our friends. I highly doubt they’ll be mad.”  

Archie nods, letting out a heavy sigh. Betty slides in next to Jughead while Kevin and Veronica share the other side of the booth. They haven’t even been seated more than two minutes before Veronica looks down, brows furrowed and goes, “Are you two holding hands?”

Archie and Jughead don’t say anything, just look around nervously, waiting for it to dawn on her. Upon putting the pieces together, Veronica’s jaw drops to the floor; Kevin looks over at Archie, eyes in a squint.

“I fucking _knew_ you weren’t straight.”

Betty laughs first, then Jughead, and before they know what’s even happening, the whole table is doubled over in a fit of laughter. As it turns out, coming out to your friends isn’t as bad as Archie had originally imagined.

Later, once they’re back home and full of fries and milkshakes, Archie and Jughead are lying on opposite ends of his bed, faced away from each other when Jughead asks out of nowhere, “Do you ever worry about dying?”

Archie sits up, stiff as a board thinking _: Betty told him. Oh God, he knows he knows he knows shit shit shit._

“Wh- why do you ask?”

Jughead shrugs. “I don’t know, just been on my mind lately.”

A thought so frightening pops into Archie’s head and it makes his blood run cold, “You’re not, like, planning something are-”

Jughead’s eyes go wide as plates as he sits up. “No, no, Arch, I’m not- I swear, I wouldn’t do that.”

Archie sighs, then breathes a little easier when Jughead reaches for his hand.

“I was just thinking about getting old.” Jughead supplies, “Wondering how things will be different then…nothing's really decided for us, you know?”

That almost- nope, definitely does- hurt worse than Archie’s original thinking that Jughead might kill himself. He has to avert his eyes when Jughead looks up at him, feeling oddly ashamed.

“Do you ever think about it? Getting older, I mean.”

_I think about what the hell I’m going to do with myself when you’re not here anymore, does that count?_

“No,” Archie lies, and that one hurts worst of all.

Jughead leaves a little later, saying he has some newspaper stuff to work on with Betty. He kisses Archie a couple times before he leaves, a well pleased look on his face as he walks out the front door.  

That night, Archie lies awake trying to think of a way to fix this. He cycles through every possible thing that comes to mind, twice even, but none of them sound practical enough. He decides, on a whim, that he’s going to need another opinion on the situation.

**///**

**January 21 st:**

_“Archie, we can’t just drive Jughead out to some remote cabin in the middle of the woods and keep him there, he’d never go for that.”_

Despite being on the phone with each other, Archie can practically feel Betty glaring at him through her bedroom window. He’s been pacing around his room for the last half hour while they talk; it’s a miracle that his shoes haven’t formed in a groove in the floor yet.

“Well we have to protect him somehow!”

_“Maybe it’s not that easy!”_ Betty exclaims, _“Maybe we can’t help him. Besides, it’s not like we can keep him alive forever.”_

“Oh, so what Jughead is just doomed? Great, I can’t wait to break the news to him that we’re just going to let him die by the end of this year.”

_“Need I remind you that we’re all going to go into the light someday. There’s no stopping that. It’s going to happen, some just come earlier than others.”_

Archie sighs as he drops onto his bed, his thoughts drifting to the bright _thirty-two_ on Betty’s chest, making him feel sick all over again; he can see it in perfect picture without even being in the same room as her.

_“Arch? What are you thinking about?”_

“…I’m not ready to lose him, Betty. I don’t think I’ll ever be.”

It’s for this exact reason that he’s completely caught off guard when he gets a call early in the morning a week and a half later. He’s halfway to school in the front seat of his truck. He digs around for his phone and it’s Kevin of all people; Archie feels his heart stop and sink into his stomach when Kevin tells him:

_“Archie, my dad just called. Jughead was in an accident this morning.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This might be the meanest cliffhanger that I've ever forced upon my readers, damn. Sorry?


	6. February

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kevin hadn’t been able to tell him much, just that Jughead and his foster dad had been in a wreck and that Sheriff Keller had been called to the scene. Both Jughead and Dave had been taken to Riverdale General Hospital, which is exactly where Archie is headed now. School can wait, especially if this day is going to end up as bad as Archie thinks it is.
> 
> After hastily parking, Archie rushes into the emergency room, as panicked as he’s ever been. His brain is going into overdrive.
> 
> _Please be okay. Please. Please._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dont know what to say about this other than _oof._ Prepare yourself, friends.

**February 1 st:**

After making a U-turn in the middle of oncoming traffic, it’s miracle that Archie himself doesn’t end up in an accident.

Kevin hadn’t been able to tell him much, just that Jughead and his foster dad had been in a wreck and that Sheriff Keller had been called to the scene. Both Jughead and Dave had been taken to Riverdale General Hospital, which is exactly where Archie is headed now. School can wait, especially if this day is going to end up as bad as Archie thinks it is.

After hastily parking, Archie rushes into the emergency room, as panicked as he’s ever been. His brain is going into overdrive.

_Please be okay. Please. **Please**._

After what feels like an eternity of searching, Archie finally finds the room, pulls back the curtain and-

Jughead is sitting up with his legs hanging over the side of the bed and Dave is standing in front of him. Jughead winces when he turns his head to look over at Archie, his eyes wide and confused by the sight of him. There’s a gash above his eyebrow that obviously just been stitched up. No other obvious injuries, though.

_Oh, thank God._

“Archie, what are you-.”

“Kevin called me,” he says, rushed, “Said you got into ‘n accident- sorry, for showing up like this, I panicked.”

“It’s okay,” Jughead says, oddly soft. “We’re fine, Archie.”

He nods, still unable to catch his breath.

_You almost weren’t. You could have died and you don’t even know it. I can’t keep leading you on like this. Like everything is fine. I can’t keep lying._

He looks between Dave and Jughead periodically, “A-Are you guys okay?”

_Of course he is, idiot, Jughead just said they were._

“Not as bad as it looks,” Dave responds, monotone, “Just a little whiplash and some stitches for Jughead, he caught the brunt of it. Damn car came up behind us so fast, it’s like they don’t know how breaks work or something.”

_Rear ended. Jughead got rear-ended of all things. At least it wasn’t as bad as I originally thought._

Archie looks over to Jughead, skeptic, “You’re good, Jug?”

Jughead shrugs, “A little sore, I guess. Nothing some more sleep wouldn’t fix.”

“I’ll go track down a nurse, see about getting you checked out,” Dave says. “Excuse me, Archie.”  

Archie side steps out of his way, allowing him to push past the curtain. Archie barely waits two seconds after Dave is gone before closing the distance between Jughead and himself, wrapping him up in a hug. Even after his arms are snug around Jughead’s neck he still feels like he can’t breathe, it’s like someone is stepping on his chest.

Jughead’s hands cover the expanse of Archie’s lower back, pressing against his ribs. “Hey, hey, I’m okay. What’s got you so worked up?”

_Only my worst fear of them all._

Archie mumbles into his neck, “Just freaked me out, that’s all. Didn’t know how bad it would be till I showed up… kinda thought I was losing you for a minute.”

Jughead almost laughs at the last part, and Archie hates himself for not saying anything.

They only get another thirty seconds of privacy before Dave comes back in, and Archie swears he’s never ripped away from someone so fast in his whole life.

“Jughead, we’re good to go, son. I’ll drop you off at the house- I’ll have to call the insurance company on my way back to the office-.”

“I can take him home, if you want,” Archie says, almost too quick, “I’ve got my truck- and I wouldn’t mind, Mr. Welch, really.”

“Fine by me- Jughead?”

He shrugs, “Works for me.”

For the first time since his phone went off that morning, Archie finally feels relieved.

Ten minutes later, Archie and Jughead are pulling up to the Welch’s small, tan house on tenth avenue; Claire’s car isn’t in the driveway, so she must be at work already. Just the idea of leaving Jughead all alone in an empty house makes the hair on the back of Archie’s neck stand on end.

“Are you sure you’re feeling okay?”

“Arch-.”

“I’m just- looking out for you, dude, really. Getting into an accident isn’t exactly a small thing.”

“I promise, I’m fine, just a little stiff if anything… but you could come inside with me if it’ll make you feel better.”  

Archie finds himself nodding without even thinking about it. His worries spike again for just a second when Jughead groans when they get out the car, but the feeling subsides when Jughead loosely tangles their fingers together, pulling Archie towards the front door.

It’s cozy inside the Welch’s house, familiar even. The boys kick off their shoes the second they come inside- Claire’s one house rule. Jughead’s room is smaller than Archie’s but still a decent size; there’s a desk in the corner, a full-size bed and a small closet tucked into the wall. The curtains are pulled back on the window across from the door, barely lighting up the beige colored room.

It’s still early, the sun is trying to break through the clouds that have formed in the sky today; Jughead still pulls Archie down onto the bed with him. It’s not even eighty thirty yet, he has to laugh.

“A nap? Really Jughead?” Archie asks.

“If it’s before noon it’s not a nap, it's just going back to bed.” He declares. “Give me a break, babe. I’m tired.”

Archie’s races all over again, but not in a bad way, for once. Archie settles in behind him on the bed, not bothering to pull the covers over themselves. Despite still being tired himself, Archie can't find it in him to fall asleep; he’s too wired after everything that’s already gone on this morning.

It doesn’t take long for Jughead to drift off, that boy could sleep through a hurricane if he really tried. Archie stays alert the entire, an arm around Jughead’s waist. There’s one thought that keeps running through his head, overpowering all the rest:

_I have to tell him,_ he decides, _Jughead_ _needs to be prepared, it’s only fair._

///

**February 10 th:**

It’s the Sunday before Valentine’s Day and Archie is still trying to convince Jughead that they should at least do something to celebrate. They’re in his room, stalling on homework.

“We’re not even going to have school that day ‘cause of parent-teacher conferences, you can come over. We’ll have a Rom-Com movie marathon or something.”   

Jughead looks at him quizzically, “First of all- you don’t even like Rom-Coms, or Valentine's Day last that I checked-.”

_“Hey!”_

“Secondly, how is having a movie night any different than what we already do every weekend?”

Archie rocks back on one heel trying to come up with something.

“Because… this time there’s more kissing and fancy chocolate involved.”

He tries to be smug and it must work at least a little because Jughead finally cracks a grin, squeezing Archie’s fingers a second later.

“You are- so _lucky_ I like you, Andrews.”

Archie forces a smile, thinking to himself: _you might not like me for much longer once I tell you everything._

///

**February 14 th:**

Archie feels like he’s going to swallow his own tongue from the moment that Jughead shows up for their movie marathon.

The plan is to tell Jughead over breakfast in the morning, to have one last good night together before everything is finally out in the open. Archie keeps trying to think of ways to tell Jughead he’s dying without jumping the gun or sounding insensitive.

_Maybe I can write him a letter, maybe it’ll hurt less that way. But I would have had to write it weeks ago, that’ll never work now. I can’t text it to him, that’s just lame. No, no it has to come from me. It has to be out loud and honest or he’ll never believe me._

“Are you okay?” Jughead asks, nudging him where they’re pressed together on Archie’s bed. _A Walk To Remember_ is playing in the background, how ironic.  

“Yeah, I’m good. Why?”

“Dunno,” Jughead murmurs, “You just seem kinda distracted, that’s all.”

“Oh? Am I not keeping up with my promises of chocolates and kissing?”

“The chocolates, yes. The other half well…”

Jughead’s face splits into a grin and Archie doesn’t have to guess what he’s getting at; a spark of joy forms in his stomach, pushing his worry aside momentarily.

“Is that right?” Archie asks, pushing himself up on one arm, “Well, I guess I’ll have to change that.”

He leans into Jughead’s side, first kissing his forehead, then his cheek, and then moves to nip at his throat. Jughead’s hands come around Archie’s face, drawing him up to his mouth before wrapping around his neck; kissing Jughead is something that Archie swears he’ll never get tired of.  

Archie rolls over even more so that his hips are pressing into Jughead’s. He props himself up on his elbows, hands hovering near Jughead’s hat. Archie can’t resist the urge to nudge it off, pushing the knit beanie aside. Archie pulls back from the kiss, looking Jughead in the eye as he moves a hand through Jughead’s dark hair.

_Whatever happens tomorrow, I hope that you’ll forgive me… hope that you’ll still let me do this._

“What?” Jughead asks, rubbing his thumb over the shell of Archie’s ear, “What is it?”    

He gapes at him, throat threatening to close up just looking at him, thinking about everything that he wants- that he _needs_ to say.

“N-Nothing,” Archie finally says. “I just… I love you.”

Jughead smiles up at him again. “I love you, too, Archie.”

A siren goes off in Archie’s head screaming _COWARD_ over and over again, but he ignores it, just tries to focus on kissing Jughead again.

Lord only knows how many more chances he’ll get to do this.

///

**February 15 th:**

Breakfast comes quicker than anticipated. Archie lies awake half the night, too anxious to sleep and once morning comes-

He can’t do it. He can’t say anything. Archie can’t ruin everything for him here; all of his best memories with Jughead have happened in this house. If Archie drops this bomb on him now, he’ll never want to come back here again; Archie wouldn’t be able to live with himself if that happened.

Which, is why, Archie insists on walking Jughead home after breakfast so he can tell Jughead there; it gives him more time to think about everything. Archie drops Jughead’s hand before going into the house, mumbles a good morning to Dave and Claire having coffee in the kitchen, following Jughead into his bedroom. He swears he’s never been this anxious before in his whole life.

“Hey, uh-.” Archie stammers, “Before I forget, there’s something I wanted to talk to you about.”

Jughead comes to a stop at the foot of the bed, looks at him over his shoulder, almost concerned.

“This isn’t one of those twisted movie moments where you tell me you cheated and got some girl pregnant, is it?”

“What- no, no, Jughead, I would never.”

“Fair, you’re right, I shouldn’t have asked- but really, what’s up?”

Archie gapes at him; maybe it’s not too late to back out, maybe he can just pray for the best and hope that nothing happens.

“What? What is-.”

“You’re gonna die, Jug.”

Regret kicks in the second the words leave his mouth.

Jughead looks confused, says, “Of course I am, we all are, what’s the-.”

“No, dude, you’re gonna die _soon_. Like before the end of this year kind of soon.”

“…what the hell are you talking about?”

Archie feels like his airway is shrinking by the second but he keeps going.

“I have this- ability, to see the age of when someone’s going to die. This stupid little blue number, right here, right where your ribs start. I don’t know why I can or how it showed up but- yours it says seventeen. Always has.”

He stiffens up, face hardening, “This is isn’t some sort of sick joke, you’re really serious about this?”

Archie nods and Jughead scoffs, shaking his head.

“This is why you weren’t freaked out at all when your dad got shot last year. Cause you just… _knew_ that he’d be fine?”

Archie nods again; Jughead’s chest is stuttering now- like it always does right before he’s about to cry. Archie hates that he’s done this to him, wants so badly to take it back.

“Wh- when, when is it happening, or how-.”

“I don’t know,” Archie interrupts. “It’s not that specific, it’s just a number, that’s all.”

“Who else knows?”

“Just Betty, that’s it.”

Jughead scoffs again, growing mad.

“So, what? You could tell Betty, but you couldn’t tell me this when we were twelve? Or fifteen or fucking _four months ago?_ You had to wait until right now? We’ve been trying to plan our futures, Archie- making important plans for the rest of our lives. Why wouldn’t you tell me something like this?”

Archie sputters, “I-I didn’t want you to be upset-.”

“Newsflash, asshole, I am upset!” Jughead yells and Archie takes a step back in surprise; Jughead’s never raised his voice at him like that. There are tears running down both of their faces now.

_Somehow this is going even worse than I imagined it would._

“I want you to leave.”

“Juggie-.”

“No, I don’t trust you right now and I don’t wanna hear it so just- get out, please.”

Archie just nods and wipes a hand over his face as he moves towards the door. He doesn’t say anything to Dave and Claire on his way out, doesn’t need them to ask what all the fighting was about.

The wind picks up on his walk back home and it feels appropriate. The sky is an ugly, gray color, mirroring the way that Archie feels right now. He can’t stop crying, even after he’s back home. It’s like someone reached inside of him and turned on all the faucets.

Luckily, his dad doesn’t ask any questions when Archie comes back in and marches right up to his room, barely making a sound. He crawls into bed almost immediately. Even with all of the blankets pulled over his head- the safest place in the world, seemingly- Archie still feels like his whole life is crashing down around him.

He ignores it later when Betty tries to call him, just pulls a pillow over his head to drown out the sound. He can only imagine what Jughead must have said to her, maybe he yelled just like he did with Archie.

_I wish I was dead,_ he thinks absently _, I wish it was me instead. No, wait- I wish I’d never said anything at all. I wish I never knew anything at all._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jughead knows! And even I'm sad about it! See you soon!


	7. March

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While they’re studying at Pop’s, Veronica makes some off-hand comment about the whole thing.
> 
> “I haven’t seen Jughead in a while,” she says without looking up, “Not to pry, but I thought you two would have been a bit more civil about a break-up. Didn’t expect him to drop dead just because his feelings were hurt.”
> 
> Archie feels his stomach leap into his throat in a second.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Both sappy and sad, sorry bout it.

**March 2 nd:**

After Archie breaks the news, Jughead practically falls off the map. He stops showing up at school, ignores the texts that Archie and everyone else sends him. The rest of February comes and goes without so much as a peep from him. Archie goes over to the Welch’s once, to try and make amends, but Claire tells him that Jughead isn’t home. He can’t say that he’s surprised; Jughead’s got as good a reason as anybody to skip town. Besides, he’d disappear if he could, too.

It hurts, sure. But he’s mad at himself more than anything. He’d been trying for months to keep something like this from happening and instead he walked right into the mess of it.

While they’re studying at Pop’s, Veronica makes some off-hand comment about the whole thing.

“I haven’t seen Jughead in a while,” she says without looking up, “Not to pry, but I thought you two would have been a bit more civil about a break-up. Didn’t expect him to drop dead just because his feelings were hurt.”

Archie feels his stomach leap into his throat in a second; Betty blanches then tries to cover it up, but Archie can’t stand to sit there anymore. He slides out of the booth and runs into the bathroom, losing his lunch as he falls to his knees.

_He’s dead. He could be dead and I wouldn’t even know it. I drove him away. I did this to him._

Archie cries as he kneels there; he’s been doing a lot of that lately. It feels like grieving someone that’s stuck in Schrödinger’s box. Jughead is dead. Jughead is not dead. It’s anyone’s guess.   

Betty appears behind him at some point and starts rubbing his back.

“Arch, it’s okay. I’m sure he’s fine, Jughead will come back-.”

“How can you be sure? We could have lost him last month; how can you be certain that he’s coming back this time? We don’t even know where he is, let alone if he’s actually alive.”

Betty gapes at him, at a loss for words. She doesn’t try to reassure him anymore, and on some level, he’s grateful for it. He doesn’t want to think about it anymore. Archie just wants this nightmare to be over already, wants Jughead to come home while he still has time. He has a sick sad feeling that he won’t be seeing Jughead for a while, if ever again.

“C’mon,” he says, wiping his eyes with his shirt, “Let’s go back out there before Veronica gets suspicious.”

Veronica has a guilty look on her face when they come back to the table, she looks right up at Archie.

“I’m sorry, Archie, I swear I didn’t-.”

“Don’t bother,” he interrupts, “It’s fine, really, Ronnie. Let’s just forget it, okay?”

She nods, and no one says another word for the next hour that they sit there. By the time they leave, the clouds have turned grey and it looks like it’s about to storm. Luckily, the rain doesn’t start until Archie’s turned onto his street, and he runs the last handful of feet up to his house. He shrugs off his jacket at the door; he’s not very wet, but he’ll still need to dry off his hair.

Archie walks into his room, looking for the towel he left in there from his shower that morning, but instead, he finds _Jughead_ , back to the door and looking out the window. Ironically, Archie’s heart nearly _stops_ at the sight of him.

_Oh, thank God. I’ve never been so grateful to be wrong about something._

“Hey,” he says carefully, “Where uh- where have you been?”

“Toledo,” Jughead throws over his shoulder, “I went to see my Mom and sister for a bit… wanted to spend some time with them, just in case.”

Archie feels his heart sink into his stomach all over again. “Did you tell them? About-.”

Jughead turns on his heel to face him. “No.” He says, defiant. “I’m not telling anyone. I can’t drag anyone else into this mess. The fact that even you and Betty know is bad enough.”

Archie just nods. He takes a step forward; he and Jughead are less than two feet apart now. Archie wants so badly to reach out and touch, to wrap him up and never let go.

“I’m glad you’re back… For a minute there, I didn’t think that I’d see you again.”

Jughead shrugs, eyes locked on the ground, “To be honest, I wasn’t sure I’d come back either… but I didn’t wanna miss your birthday.”

Right. Archie’s birthday _tomorrow_. He’s finally going to be seventeen, the second to last out of all his friends. He’d completely forgotten about it in the mess of worrying about Jughead.

“It’s just a day, Jug,” Archie says, “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“I know, but… I don’t know if I’m gonna get any more with you. Guess I wanted to make this one special, that’s all.”

Something between a laugh and a cry bubbles out of Archie’s throat; he looks up only to find that Jughead’s eyes are just as tearful as his own. Archie can’t stop himself anymore. He reaches out, hand finding Jughead’s elbow. Before he’s even tried to pull him closer, Jughead is wrapping his arms around Archie’s neck, hiding his face in his collarbone.

“I hate this,” Jughead whines, “I hate this so goddamn much.”

Archie’s hands go to his waist out of instinct, holding on to as much of him as he can. They start crying before either one can even try to stop it; ugly and loud in the other’s ear, both of them mad at the world for being the way it is.

///

**March 3rd:**

**_Archie:_ ** _you should come over I have a small surprise_

**_Betty:_ ** _???_

**_Betty_ ** _: Arch we’re supposed to surprise you on your birthday, not the other way around._

**_Archie_ ** _: just come over I promise you’ll like it_

“Is she coming or not?” Jughead asks from the other side of the island, he spins a stray coaster under his fingers.  

“Think so,” Archie replies, looking up for only a second, “She hasn’t answered in a few minutes so-.”

A knock at the front door cuts him off; “It’s open!” Archie calls.

Betty lets herself in, tucking a stray hair behind her ear; she isn’t wearing her usual ponytail for once.

“Archie? I’m here, what’s the big-.” She stops short at the sight of Jughead, then launches into a near sprint two seconds later.

Jughead stands finally, bracing himself for her hug. Betty throws her arms around his shoulders while Jughead’s move to her back. Archie watches fondly from off to the side; he forgets sometimes that Betty knows Jughead just as well as he does- maybe even better, in some aspects.

Betty steps back after a minute, smacking Jughead lightly on the chest, “Where the hell have you been? I thought you were dead.”

“Not yet.” He mutters.

A stern _“Jughead,”_ comes from both Betty and Archie.

He holds his hands up in defense. “Joke. That was a joke… now can we go to Pop’s? I think I’m going through withdrawal from not having one of his burgers in so long.”

Archie and Betty laugh with a shake of their heads, but move towards the door anyway; it’s relief to see that some things never change.

///

**March 20 th:**

The boys spend all of spring break together; Jughead barely leaves the Andrews house except for the few times they go to Pop’s. On the last night before they have to go back to school, Betty, Veronica, and Kevin come over for an impromptu movie night, Archie’s idea.

“We’ve been ignoring them all week, Jug. We have to at least act like they’re still our friends. They’re going to figure out somethings up with us eventually if we don’t.”

Jughead rolls his eyes, but agrees nonetheless; the two of them have agreed not to tell anyone else about what they know, about what’s in store for Jughead. As much as Archie hates, he knows it’s the right move; he doesn’t want to hurt anyone else with this information. It’s already done enough damage as it is; why ruin a good time, right?

At a quarter to seven, Veronica arrives with more fancy candies than Archie even knew existed, it’s a miracle that she was even able to fit them all in her purse. Betty comes out of the kitchen carrying a six-pack of sodas and the largest bowl she could find for popcorn, for a second all she can do is stare at the candy arrangement, purely dumbfounded.

She shakes her head, setting her snacks down on what little space is left on the table. “Alright, what are we watching first?”

“Isn’t there supposed to be some new Godzilla movie out-.”

“No offense, Arch, but I’d rather not see people get ripped apart for two hours.” Kevin interjects, “What about something on Netflix? I think there’s-.”

“We’ve seen all of those, Kevin. _Twice_. I want something new, with a little romance, surely there’s got to be something that none of us has seen yet- Jug? How about you? Any recommendations?”  

Jughead looks up from where he’s curled up in the loveseat; it’s obvious that he hadn’t been paying attention to the conversation going on around him. Archie’s noticed that he’s been more and more distracted as of late, he has a good idea as to why, too.

“Uh- it doesn’t matter to me,” he mutters. “Pick whatever you want.”

Veronica raises an eyebrow, “What’s this? The one and only movie connoisseur Jughead Jones _doesn’t_ have an opinion on what film we watch for once? This must be the apocalypse- are you feeling okay?”

Jughead musters half a laugh for her joke then goes back to picking at the worn-down part of his boots; the blank, almost faraway look on his face breaks Archie’s heart.

_I wish there was something that I could do to keep him from hurting._

The girls eventually settle on some early 2000s rom-com to watch, but the conversation continues throughout, light and jovial. Archie spends a lot of time watching the way that Jughead is watching everyone else; it's like he’s trying to soak in every little ounce that he can while he’s still got the time. It’s sobering in a sad way.

///

**March 29 th:**

The two of them are lying together on Archie’s bed; Jughead is flat on his back while Archie has his head on Jughead’s shoulder, hand holding the inside of his arm.

“I want Daylilies at my funeral.”

Archie’s head whips up so fast that he hears something crack in his neck; that’s the last thing he expected to hear today.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“I want Daylilies, at the services- and a closed casket, I highly doubt anyone will want to look at my ugly mug after I-.”

“ _Jug_.”   

“C’mon. We have to have this conversation sometime. Besides, I don’t trust anybody else with stuff like this… you’re the only one who ever really listens to me, Arch.”

Archie thinks about it for a minute before sighing. He settles onto his side so that they’re face to face.

“Okay. Daylilies. Closed Casket. Anything else?

Jughead shrugs, “I don’t know. Just don’t let it be a complete bummer. I’d hate to think that people are crying over me just cause I got struck by lightning or some shit.”

Archie musters a laugh, “You know what would be more fun than planning a funeral?”

“What?”

“Planning a wedding.”

“ _Archie_.”

“What’s the harm in imaging? All we ever talk about is the sad stuff these days; it’d be nice to think about something else for once. It doesn’t have to be ours, specifically, just… think about it. And- for the record- you’re not ugly, not in the slightest.”

“You’re biased.”

“Maybe, but I’m also _right_.”

Jughead rolls his eyes, then furrows his brow, “You really wanna get married someday?”

“Think so,” Archie replies, softly, “Spending the rest of my life with someone I really love sounds like a pretty good deal to me. Maybe buy a house, have a couple kids. You don’t want that?”

He shrugs. “I don’t know, from what I’ve seen marriage doesn’t tend to work out in anybody’s favor. I don’t know if I’d be very good at it, never mind bringing a couple of kids into the mix. I was always afraid of my dad as a kid, I don’t think I’d know what to do with myself if I did that to someone else, even accidentally.”

Jughead doesn’t mention his dad much, he knows it’s a bit of a sore subject- so Archie doesn’t press the topic any further, just keeps going.

“I always saw myself being a dad, kinda like the idea of having twins, actually.”

“What? Like the Blossoms?”

“No,” Archie laughs, “Like- like just two boys or two girls, that way I can give ‘em the same middle name or something.”

“And you’d dress them up in matching outfits too, right?”

“Obviously.”

The both of them laugh, light-hearted- the sad feeling in the room is fading by the second.

“I guess that doesn’t sound so bad.”

“It’d be better if you were there… doing it all with me”

Jughead drops his gaze, swallows harshly. A hush falls over the room; grief creeping in just as quickly as it left. Archie tucks his face back into Jughead’s shoulder, unable to look at him any longer. He thinks of something else.

“Jug?”

“Yeah?”

“Why do you want Daylilies at your funeral?”

“Because they’re red on the outside and golden in the center… they remind me of you.”


	8. April

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Has it ever been wrong?” Jughead asks, mostly out of nowhere. “Your little gift?”
> 
> Archie shakes his head, not needing the clarification, “Not as far as I can remember, no… why?”
> 
> “Just wondering… er- hoping, I guess.”
> 
> Quiet falls on them again. Archie keeps looking over at Jughead only to find him biting his lip, looking perplexed; he can’t shake the feeling that maybe there’s something Jughead’s not telling him.
> 
> “Is there something on your mind, Jug?”
> 
> “…should we break up? Before I die, I mean?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This update is way late and I'm v sorry it's my own fault but at least I updated? Yeah idk.

**April 8 th:**

Archie has gotten into the habit of texting Jughead as soon as he wakes up in the morning, just to make sure that he’s still alive. More often than not, he feels like he can’t even breathe until Jughead responds. A few days ago, it had taken Jughead nearly an hour to reply and he’d had to call Archie just to talk him down from a panic attack.

They’re at lunch, just the two of them for a change. Jughead looks exhausted more than usual, the bags under his eyes are more prominent.

“Have you been sleeping okay, dude?”

Jughead glares daggers at him.

Archie holds his hands up in defense, “You just look really tired, that’s the only reason I asked.”

His response is a bitter, “If I don’t sleep, I can’t die while I’m doing it, right?”

Archie shuts up; he doesn’t bring up the topic again.

///

**April** **20 th**:

Archie and Jughead slip out early from Veronica’s birthday party; the music is too loud for either one of their likings and Jughead was starting to feel worn out from being around so many people at once. Archie couldn’t blame him, having that many people tucked into such a small space made even Archie feel like he was suffocating.

They make a small detour at Jughead’s request, and a few minutes later the boys find themselves in the old Twilight Drive-In lot. Nothing ever became of the place after everything was demolished, just an empty field sitting out there for years, waiting for something or someone to come along and call it home.

Archie pulls a couple of spare blankets out from the backseat before setting them up in the bed of the truck. Jughead and Archie lie flat on their backs, staring straight up at the sky.

“Why’d you wanna come out here, Jug?”

“It’s easier to see the stars out here,” Jughead replies, “No ambient light or anything like that; it was one of the few perks about being homeless and living out here.”

Archie _hmm_ s in response, finds Jugheads hand in the blankets, squeezes his thumb between his fingers, but doesn’t let go. For a while, the only sounds come from the crickets and other various nature noises.

“Has it ever been wrong?” Jughead asks, mostly out of nowhere. “Your little gift?”

Archie shakes his head, not needing the clarification, “Not as far as I can remember, no… why?”

“Just wondering… er- hoping, I guess.”

Quiet falls on them again. Archie keeps looking over at Jughead only to find him biting his lip, looking perplexed; he can’t shake the feeling that maybe there’s something Jughead’s not telling him.

“Is there something on your mind, Jug?”

“…should we break up? Before I die, I mean?”

Archie’s whole body goes stiff in a second at even the _idea_ -

“Absolutely not,” he says, propping himself up on his elbow. “There’s no fucking way I’m letting you walk away from me that easily.”  

“I’m not walking away from you, I just wanted to make it easier for you when I-.”

“No,” Archie says, forcefully, “There’s not a single scenario out of this situation in which you leaving me is going to be even remotely easy, Jughead. You breaking up with me _is not_ going to fix this. Why would you even-.”

“Okay, _okay_ ,” Jughead says in a rush; his hand moves to cradle Archie’s head, trying to calm him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t-.” He stops, sighs, “I’m sorry… I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad.”  

Archie doesn’t say anything else, just lets his elbow drop out from under him, hiding his face in Jughead’s shoulder. Jughead doesn’t take his hand off of Archie’s head and he’s grateful for it.

They don’t end up staying much longer; there’s a tension in the air now, palpable in the worst way. It’s quiet in the car on the way back to Jughead’s foster parents' house; nothing is said until more than halfway there.

“You’re mad,” Jughead deadpans.

“I’m not mad-.”

“Yes, _you are_. I know because you’re not saying anything.”

“What am I supposed to say, Jughead? You’re the one who suggested breaking up in the first place.”

“Only because I thought it would help.”

“Right because us splitting up is going to make losing you easier somehow? Since when does that make sense?”

“First of all, I don’t want you to be known as Archie Andrews, the guy whose boyfriend _died_. Secondly, if it means that you won’t feel guilty about moving on to someone else in future then yeah, it would make sense.”

“What the hell are you talking about? Why would I feel guilty ab-.”

Jughead cuts him off, shifting to face Archie. “Because, it’s what you do, Archie. You have this heart of gold that you just- _give out_ to _everyone._ Like it’s second nature to you or something _._ And then you worry about hurting those people, even when they aren’t in your life anymore. I’ve watched you do this for years, and I’ll be damned if I’m ever the direct cause of that. I don’t want to cause any more of your hurting; don’t you get that?”

Archie bites the inside of his cheek, absorbing everything that Jughead told him. He wants to fight it- wants to tell Jughead that he’s wrong; so he does.

“You’re wrong,” he mutters through his teeth.

“What?”

“You’re wrong, about me getting over you someday- that’s not going to happen. I’m going to carry you with me for the rest of my life.”

Jughead’s face falls, so do his shoulders. He shifts back to his original position, staring out the window once again.

_So much for having a constructive conversation._

Despite the tension, Archie still walks Jughead up to the door once he’s home, grabs his wrist before he can duck inside without saying anything.

“Jug, wait- um.”

Jughead stills, turns, but doesn’t meet Archie's eye; Archie squeezes his wrist, once, twice.

“I love you,” he whispers.

Jughead looks up at him finally, his eyes forlorn. “I love you, too.”

Archie leans forward, kisses his forehead before resting his own there for a minute. He shifts his hands so that he can weave his fingers together with Jughead’s. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t listening to you before; that’s not fair.”

“It’s fine,” Jughead mumbles. “I’m used to it.”

“That doesn’t mean you deserve it.”

Jughead squeezes Archie’s fingers, then sniffles before taking a step back. Archie can’t help but notice that his eyes are watery.

“I should go inside.”

“Jughead-.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow, Arch.”

The front door shuts in his face, and just like that Archie’s alone again. He supposed in some weird, melancholic way, that he’ll have to get used to it eventually.

///

**April 21 st:**

Archie wakes up on the couch in the morning with his dad standing over him, holding a cup of coffee. The digital clock on the table across from him says 8:39- too early to be awake on a Sunday, in his opinion.

“I haven’t seen you do this in a while,” Fred notes, settling into the loveseat behind him. “What’s on your mind, Arch?”

“Nothing- why do you ask?”

“Cause every time there’s something bothering you, I find you asleep on the couch. I can tell that something’s been eatin’ at you lately; kinda thought that you would’ve come talk to me by now.”

Archie gets this sinking feeling in his gut. He didn’t realize that he’d been pushing his dad away through all of this. In fact, this might be the longest conversation that the two of them have had in weeks. He’s been so wrapped up in other things that he didn’t stop to think about what was right in front of him.

“Is it that obvious?”

“To me, yeah. To be fair, Jughead hasn’t seemed much himself either these last few weeks. You two tend to go hand in hand when it comes to how you’re feeling.”

_I wish I could tell him he’s wrong; I’ve spent too much time lying to him about everything._

“I’m sorry,” Archie whispers.

“Don’t apologize; just let me know how I can help.”

“It’s not that big of deal, Dad, really. We’re-.”

“I know you like to think that you have things under control, but it’s okay to need someone to lean on every once and awhile. You and Jughead- you guys are too young to be so beat down and tired all of the time. Whatever this is, let someone help. _Please_ , son.”

Archie worries his bottom lip between his teeth, draws his legs up so they’re leaning against the side of the couch. He runs his thumb over a fraying thread in the middle of cushion, trying to decide how he wants to phrase this- or if he even wants to talk about all of it in the first place.

“There’s… something going on, with Jughead. Betty and I are the only ones that know, because he doesn’t want to make a big deal out of it or- hurt anybody, I guess. But I can tell that it’s hurting him even if he won’t come right out and say it. I wanna help, y’know? I just… I don’t know how, without overstepping my boundaries.”

“Sometimes there isn’t a way to help,” Fred tells him. “You’re not responsible for fixing all the world’s problems, Archie. This might be something has Jughead just has to face head-on.”

_I don’t know if head first is exactly the best way to go about finding yourself in an early grave,_ Archie wants to say, but doesn’t. It would only make his dad ask more questions.  

“Yeah,” he says flatly, “Maybe you’re right.”

Before either one can say anything else, Archie’s cell phone is buzzing on the table. He flips it over, pulling it into his palm; it’s a text from Jughead.

**_Jughead_ ** _: Betty has an idea._

///

**April 25 th:**

Surprisingly enough, skipping school is Betty’s idea. The three of them drive out to Greendale Hospital to see a doctor that her parents have connections with; she sputters when Archie and Jughead try to ask how she knows Dr. Curdle in the first place.

“He helps my mom out with some stuff for the register- actually, uh, it’s probably better that you guys didn’t know.”

Archie and Jughead don’t press it again.

It’s a bit of a stretch, and a costly one at that, but the three of them somehow manage to convince Dr. Curdle to run every single test that he can think of; anything that would give them a clue as how to help Jughead. If he’s sick- if it’s something that they can stop or even _fix_ , then they’re gonna damn well try.

“You do understand though, I’m just a mortician- this isn’t-”

“Just run the stupid tests,” Jughead bites, arms crossed over his chest. “This is kind of a time-sensitive issue.”

Archie acts like he hadn’t seen Betty flinch out of the corner of his eye at the words.

They only give Dr. Curdle as much information as they need to. Archie and Betty say that Jughead hasn’t been himself, that there’s something on that they can’t see. It’s enough to convince him into testing without also spilling the big secret at the risk of sounding like a bunch of crackheads.    

Archie can’t decide what is more nerve-wracking, the drive there or the wait after every test has been run. Jughead reaches over and squeezes his shaking leg more than once, trying to get him to calm down; after the fourth time, he looks downright annoyed.

“If you vibrate any harder, you’re going to fall through the floor. _Relax_ , dude.”

“Sorry, I’m just- so-.”

“Archie, I love you to death, I do, but if you apologize again then I’m going to force feed you Sour Patch Kids.”

“But I hate those.”  

“ _Exactly_.”

Archie can’t tell if he’s being serious or not so he just laughs anxiously- and crosses his legs.

It’s another forty minutes before any of the tests come back and the group sits in silence for most of that time, too anxious to make conversation. Eventually, Dr. Curdle comes into the back room where he’d asked them to wait and says-

“Far as I can tell, there’s nothing wrong with you, Mr. Jones. A little sleep deprived, maybe, but other than that you’re perfectly healthy.”

None of them make a sound- hell, no one even breathes. Archie doesn’t know whether to be even more afraid or relieved.

_This wasn’t the answer that I was expecting, then again- I wasn’t really expecting any of this._

Dr. Curdle leaves after a minute- but only after Betty has paid him- and the three of them sit in silence again; none of them really know what to say in a moment like this.

Betty gets up finally, rubbing her hands on her jeans. “Okay, so what does this tell us? at least we know it’s not something physical. We can rule that out.”

“Sure, but you’re forgetting something else,” Archie responds. “That still leaves a billion other things on the table, car accidents, suicide-.”

“Okay, that again? _Really_?”

“Sorry, Jug, just- it’s too broad of a scale, there’s no way that we can narrow this down.”

“Well, maybe not right now but-.”

“No,” Jughead says, defeated. “No, Archie’s right. There’s too much to consider… let’s just call me damned and leave it at that.”

He gets up and leaves without another word, and Archie and Betty don’t know what else to do, so they just follow him out to the car. Jughead sinks into the backseat on the way home and doesn’t say a word the entire time. No one does.

It hurts too much to think about.


	9. May

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His paranoia has returned with a vengeance; it feels like the weeks right after his dad was shot all over again. His inability to relax or focus, the nightmares- all of them back and worse than before. A lot of his dreams involve Jughead, dying in some shape or form and Archie is always two seconds too late to stop it. It leaves him restless and exhausted constantly.
> 
> And yeah, even though he knew on some level that his dad would be fine, there was always that voice of what if in the back of his head. What if he’s wrong about all of this? What if something horrible really is going to happen?
> 
> What if nothing happens to Jughead at all? What if he never dies, despite what Archie sees.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friends, there's minor mentioning of a panic attack and some light vomiting in this chapter- just a heads up! Thanks for sticking with me this far!

**May 12 th:**

Some days he can ignore it. Some days, Archie can act he isn’t walking on eggshells waiting for his whole life to come crashing down- waiting for Jughead to finally _leave him_. Other days it hurts so much that it feels like Jug is already dead, which almost makes it worse.

His paranoia has returned with a vengeance; it feels like the weeks right after his dad was shot all over again. His inability to relax or focus, the nightmares- all of them back and worse than before. A lot of his dreams involve Jughead, dying in some shape or form and Archie is always two seconds too late to stop it. It leaves him restless and exhausted constantly.

And yeah, even though he knew on some level that his dad would be fine, there was always that voice of _what if_ in the back of his head. What if he’s wrong about all of this? What if something horrible really is going to happen?

What if nothing happens to Jughead at all? What if he never dies, despite what Archie sees.

Every time that Archie asks if they can talk about things, Jughead shuts him down or shuts him out and goes home. It’s like trying to talk to a wall; it's like he’s already given up on himself. It’s frustrating, but Archie worries that if he pushes too much then Jughead will push him away for good.

Jughead goes through periods of being downright angry to absolutely depressed about the whole thing. He spends a lot of time curled up in his bed; even Archie and bribes of a weeks worth of burgers from Pop’s are unable to coax him out.

They’re in Jughead’s shoebox of a bedroom, cuddling in the late afternoon. It’s another one of those days where Jughead hasn’t left his room; he was still asleep when Archie showed up at two o’clock. Archie has his chest pressed up against Jughead’s back and is halfway to asleep himself when Jughead says:

“I told Dave and Claire.”

Archie lifts his head, looking at him over his shoulder. “You did?” He asks, surprised.  

“Figured I better.” Jughead says, flatly, “Either they bury a teenager they hardly know or they kick me out at eighteen, neither option really swings in my favor.”

Archie feels a lump form in his throat. “What did they say?”

“Nothing, really. I think they just thought I was high or something.”

Archie hums, unsure of how to respond. Jughead starts crying a minute later, quick and panicky; Archie’s never seen him like this. He’s not sure what to do right away, isn’t sure whether to hug him or get up and leave him alone.

“I don’t- I don’t want to go.” He says, voice breaking, “This isn’t f-fair. I wanted more time with you.”

Archie doesn’t know what to say that won’t make him cry as well, so he doesn’t say anything. After some careful contemplation, he pulls at Jughead’s arms until he finally rolls over, then holds Jughead as tight as he can. Jughead shakes against him, crying against Archie’s throat, grasping at his shirt.

Archie wants to say that they’ll figure this out somehow, but the more he thinks about it the more it feels like a lie. So he doesn’t bother with saying anything, just holds him tighter.

_I wish there was some way that I could make this easier for him._

///

**May 19 th:**

Archie, Betty, Veronica, and Jughead are taking a break from studying for finals and going to Pop’s. The weather outside is finally warming up after an unending winter, so the four of them decide to walk and enjoy the spring air.

Veronica is talking animatedly between Archie and Betty, telling some story from her New York party girl days. The blue sixty-eight hovering over her chest seems duller than usual in the bright light of the sun setting behind them.

Admittedly, Archie’s only halfway listening to what she’s saying. Most of his attention is locked on his boyfriend; not unusual for him, really. Jughead is walking ahead of the group, head down and with earbuds in, caught up in his own little world. He’s been noticeably preoccupied most of the day, and Archie can’t seem to pull him out of it, no matter what he tries. Archie wants more than anything to pick his brain, to see what the hell could have him so distracted from the rest of the world.

“So- there I am, half a joint deep and the son of some former Yankees player is trying to- what the hell is he doing?”

Archie’s head whips up, immediately finding Jughead.

Jughead is twelve feet in front of them, already drawing close to the crosswalk with his head still down. There’s a sleek, black Mercedes Benz approaching from the opposite side of the street, gaining speed the closer it gets with its blinker on.

It’s headed right towards _where Jughead is about to walk into the road._

“Oh my God,” Betty gasps, “That car- he’s gonna-.”

“Jug… Jughead _stop_!” Archie yells, trying to get his attention, but it’s no use. The car is getting closer and closer by the second and still Jughead has his gaze locked on the ground.

Archie breaks out into a sprint, moving faster than he has in all his life. At the very last second, Archie gets an arm around Jughead’s stomach and pulls him back from the road just as the Mercedes rushes around the corner, laying on the horn as it goes.

Archie and Jughead both fall to the ground in a heap of limbs; Jughead hits the ground with a gasp, the sound echoing in Archie’s ear. Archie pants as Jughead lands mostly on top of him. Archie lets his head drop back against the sidewalk as he tries to squash the panic crawling through his bloodstream. Archie pats his hand over Jughead’s chest, making sure that everything is still intact and that neither of them broke any bones.

Jughead’s earbuds lie in the middle of the road, having been ripped off when Archie grabbed him. They’re _crushed_.

_I don’t even want to think about how bad this could have been if we weren’t here._

Betty and Veronica rush up to them now, looking as freaked out as Archie feels inside.

“Are you guys okay?” Betty asks; Archie doesn’t answer, just picks his head up off the ground to look for Jughead’s reaction.

Jughead’s distracted reverie finally splits as he sits up, immediately earning himself a face full of one pissed off Veronica Lodge.

“What the hell were you thinking?” She shrieks, pushing at Jughead’s shoulder. “Are you trying to _get yourself killed?_ ”

Archie pushes himself up on an arm, “Veronica, don’t-.”

It’s pointless trying to get her to stop. By the time the sentence has left her mouth, Jughead’s already choking on his own breath, a sure sign of an impending panic attack. He pushes away from all of them, scrambling to reach the grass as he coughs up the small breakfast he’d eaten that morning. Archie doesn’t touch him at all, he knows that would just make this worse.

Jughead wipes at his mouth with a shaking hand after the retching ceases, still breathing heavy as he looks up at all of his friends. He sits back on his ankles, shoulders losing all of their tension.

“Jughead? Are you alright?” Betty asks, tone careful.  

He rubs at his breast bone, leaving his hand there for a long moment; it’s like he’s trying to figure out if his heart is still in one piece or not. He looks around guardedly- as if he’s still trying to put together where he’s even at right now.

“I’m, uh,” he stammers, “I’m gonna go home.”

“Jughead-.” Archie tries.

“N-no. I need- I need to go home. Just. Jus’ leave me alone, p-please.”

Jughead pushes himself to his feet, stepping back on tottery legs; Archie does the same. No one says anything as they watch Jughead walk off in the other direction, headed towards the Welch’s house, away from his friends. Once he’s out of earshot, Veronica turns to Archie and Betty, her expression baffled.

“What even was that? I swear it’s like he’s trapped inside his own head or something these days.”

Veronica’s hair swings over her shoulder as she spares a glance back at Jughead before finally crossing the street. Betty squeezes Archie’s arm, catching his eye.

“Is he okay?”

Archie looks over to Jughead as well, watching his figure disappear further and into the sunset.

“No.” He tells her. “No, he’s not.”

///

It’s nearly ten o’clock that same night before he hears from Jughead again. Archie’s phone rings in front of him on his desk. Jughead starts talking before he’s even had a chance to say hello.

_“It was an accident,”_ Jughead says. _“What happened this afternoon with the car was an accident. I swear, Archie, I wasn’t trying to-.”_

“It’s okay, Jughead. I believe you… but Betty and Ronnie might take a little more convincing if you ask me.”

A sigh comes from the other end. _“I don’t even know what’s happening to me, it’s like I can’t even think straight these days.”_

“What had you so distracted anyway?”

_“I thinking about my sister,”_ Jughead says, glumly, _“She’s been calling me a lot more lately, it’s like she knows something that she shouldn’t. A part of me wants to tell her, the other doesn’t even wanna think about how she would react to all of this.”_    

_Damn_ , Archie thinks to himself, _I hadn’t even thought about what someone else would think about this. There’s really is no way to escape grief._

“That’s a lot to hold in, Jug. No wonder you’ve been so distracted.”  

_“Yeah, well, it’s not like there’s an easier way to go about this that won’t hurt anyone.”_

A silence falls between; Archie rubs at a groove in his desk, trying to think of where the dent came from. No recollection comes to mind.

“I’m sorry about your headphones.” Archie finally says.

_“It’s fine. Maybe I can ask Claire for some new ones as a graduation gift or something.”_

Archie _hmm_ s but doesn’t get a response; there goes that silence again.

_“Arch?”_

“Yeah?”

_“…I’m really scared- about what’s coming.”_

“I know, Jughead. I’m scared too.”

///

**May 23 rd:**

Somehow, despite Jughead missing two straight weeks of school and Archie only just skating by in his classes, they both end their junior year without having to make up any summer classes. A miracle in itself, really.

On the very last day, Jughead walks right up to Archie as everyone is trying to rush out of the building and says very matter of fact: “I wanna go on that road trip.”

Archie’s eyes go wide; he’d forgotten all about the road trip they were supposed to go on two summers ago.  

“Really?”

“Yeah, really, I wanna go. Besides, you owe me since you ditched last time.”

“I said I was sorry!”

“Relax, I know you did.” Jughead says, grinning, “I was just thinking about it- all the adventures we missed out on. We could still go, you know?  Maybe rework it a little, make the trip longer this time? We can make it like a bucket list trip or something-.”

“ _Jug_ -.”

“ _Kidding_ , I was kidding, but seriously… I’d really like to go. I mean it, ma and pa diners, shitty hotels, little to no privacy, all of it. Just the two of us.”

Archie raises an eyebrow, asks “Why now?”

“Hate to say it, but it kind of feels like we’re never going to get another chance.”

Archie nods, hating that he has to agree with him. “Alright, let’s do it. We’ll meet up at Pop’s later, plan it out, make a date out of it.”

“Okay, but you’re paying.”

“…I’d pay anyway.”

“I know,” Jughead says, kissing him once, hand on his collar, “That’s why I like you so much.”

///

**May 31 st:**

Archie and Jughead get to planning the road trip and set to leave by the end of the week. It takes two hours to put everything together- and to figure out if they have enough money to do it in the first place. Fred chips in a little, so do Dave and Claire, weirdly enough. Once they’ve put it all together and decided that yes, Archie’s truck will get them to Wyoming and back in one piece, it’s just a matter of packing.

“Are you sure about this?” Archie asks; they leave in the morning and he still can’t seem to piece together why Jughead wants this so badly.

“For the dozenth time, _yes_ , I’m sure. If you ask me again, I might just have to go by myself.”

Archie rolls his eyes, “Very funny.”

“I try.”

Betty, Veronica, and Kevin end up coming over for a while; the five of them end up spending more time laughing more than actually watching the movie they’d put on. Archie can’t remember the last time all of them were able to this, just laugh and be a bunch of teenagers for once; it’s like nothing else in the world matters.

He watches Jughead spend an uncharacteristic amount of time telling Betty and everyone else goodnight, but tries not to think anything of it. It happens again in the morning; watches from his truck in the Welch’s driveway as Jughead hugs both Dave and Claire. As much as he wants to, Archie doesn’t say anything about it when he gets into the car.

Jughead gets into the front seat of the truck with a sigh, almost jittery.

“You good?”

“Yeah,” he says. “Let’s do this.”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might have to post the last two chapter all at once because... oh man it would be cruel of me if I didn't. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you liked this update!


	10. June

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their room is quaint and yet perfectly sized for just the two of them. The bed takes a majority of the space, but there’s still more than enough room to move around, as well as the bathroom in the corner. Archie strips out of his shirt as he crosses the space.
> 
> “I bet the view would be great if it wasn’t raining,” Archie says, pulling at the blinds.
> 
> “I dunno,” Jughead says, smugly, “I think this view is pretty good as it is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friends, once again, a pretty nasty cliffhanger at the end of this chapter. Don't fret, I'll be updating again this weekend. Gotta say though, there's some fluff in this chapter that I wouldn't want to miss out on. It's up to you.
> 
> Also, trigger warning in the end notes.

**June 1 st:**

The boys go everywhere that they ever dreamed of. The first stop is in Toledo, they stay with Gladys and Jellybean for a night before getting on the road again. Gladys doesn’t even bat an eye when Archie says something about dating Jughead, just says _well it’s about damn time_. Jughead doesn’t stop smiling the entire time that they’re there, hugs his little sister every time she’s within arm’s reach of him.

As dumb as it sounds, Archie can feel himself relaxing the further away from home that they get, can see the way that Jughead does the same thing. He’d do anything to keep things this way.

///

**June 3 rd:**

They do a lot of stupid shit that they always talked about doing. Their first real stop after Toledo is Nebraska. Archie founds a hotel that only runs thirty-five bucks a night and books a room for three days.

The Omaha zoo is even better than the pictures. Jughead takes a picture with a falcon on his arm and then insists that they gorge themselves on a funnel cake. The stomachache later is most definitely worth it. By the time they come back to the hotel, Archie and Jughead are both sun-kissed and exhausted. They get into bed and fall asleep before they’ve even had a chance to take their clothes off.

In the morning, after staying in bed much longer than necessary, they find a dive restaurant down the road from the hotel. A bright-eyed, sandy-haired girl that can’t be much older than either of them brings them pancakes, bacon, and potatoes piled so high it nearly reaches their noses.

Archie and Jughead spend ten minutes in absolute silence, too busy enjoying their food.

“It’s really good,” Archie says, after a while, mouth full of hash browns.

“Yeah.”

“Not as good as Pop’s though.”

“ _Nothing_ is good as Pop’s.”

“…not even Claire’s pot roast?”

“I never should’ve told you that.”

///

**June 7 th:**

It’s a nearly fifteen-hour drive from Nebraska to Yellowstone and Archie is really trying not to go stir crazy from all the driving; at least this jaunt of the trip is split over two days so they’re not wearing themselves out trying to get there.

Somehow, himself and Jughead ran out of things to talk about three hours ago, besides the obvious, at least. Both of them have been trying to avoid any death talk, they’re trying to have a good time without worrying that something could happen while they’re away from home.

Archie keeps itching to reach over and turn on the stereo, but he knows that Jughead will make fun of his music choices if he does.

Jughead sighs after the third time of watching him squirm, “Arch, just turn on the radio already.”

“But you hate it.”

“So? We’re both voluntarily on this trip, I’m not gonna keep you from listening to music that you like just because it gives me a headache.”

“…for real?”

“Oh _my god_ , just-.”

Jughead leans over and twists the dial to the right; the Carly Rae Jepsen CD that has been in Archie’s stereo for the last two months starts to play through the speakers. Archie looks over at Jughead smiling widely.  

“I love you.”

“Love you too, Archie… this is quite gay of you though.”

“ _Okay-_.”

///

**June 8 th:**

Of course, with their luck, it rains the whole day as they finally make it to Wyoming.

By the time they reach Yellowstone, it’s nine o’clock and still pouring outside. Both of them agree that actually camping outside can wait until tomorrow when the weather is supposed to be better. Archie and Jughead get soaked as they try to bring their stuff in from the truck; both of them are dripping across the floor as they finally get everything inside.

_Old Faithful Inn_ is expansive and far nicer than any other hotel Archie has ever stayed in, certainly nicer than any place in Riverdale. A younger guy named Spencer checks them in at the front desk. “Two queens, I take it?”

Jughead snickers beside him and Archie nudges him under the desk.

“Uh, no, one king-sized is fine.”

Jughead continues to laugh until they make it to their room, no matter how many times Archie tries to get him to stop by glaring in his direction.

Their room is quaint and yet perfectly sized for just the two of them. The bed takes a majority of the space, but there’s still more than enough room to move around, as well as the bathroom in the corner. Archie strips out of his shirt as he crosses the space.

“I bet the view would be great if it wasn’t raining,” Archie says, pulling at the blinds.

“I dunno,” Jughead says, smugly, “I think this view is pretty good as it is.”

Archie looks over his shoulder and Jughead is already there, hands finding his hips and turning Archie around to face him. Jughead’s hands move up Archie’s sides, over his chest and shoulders, up to his face to pull him closer. Archie’s hand finds the dead center of Jugheads chest, bunching up the material of his shirt between his fingers as they kiss.

Jughead pulls back, looking down between them and smiling.

“What? What is it?”

“You’re wearing the bracelet I made you.”

Archie looks down at his wrist, eyes falling to the colorful fabric, to their initials still hanging from the ends of the thread.

“Of course, I am,” Archie says. “I never take it off.”

Jughead grins at him then pulls him in for another kiss, deeper this time. Archie’s hands move to Jughead’s wrists after a few minutes, halting him.

“I should really take a shower.”

“Hm, you could,” Jughead says, mouthing over the side of his face, “Or, we could take advantage of this big ass bed and make out until we fall asleep.”

Archie contemplates it, eyes falling shut for a moment when Jughead finds that one spot under his jaw. “Oh-okay, but just for a few minutes.”

“Uh huh.”

“I mean it, Jug, just ten minutes.”

“Right,” Jughead says, tugging at Archie’s belt loops. “Whatever you say, big guy.”

Archie doesn’t end up showering until the next morning, and Jughead doesn’t even care in the slightest.

///

**June 10 th:**

“Do we have to?”

“There’s no way that we can drive all the way out here and then just _not_ see Old Faithful, Arch. C’mon. Just ten minutes and then we can get on the road to Montana. Please?”

Archie pushes his tongue against the inside of his cheek, trying to think of a way that he can get out of this; Jughead’s eyebrows furrow before he can say anything.

“Wait, are you- are you afraid of the geyser?”

“It’s unpredictable!”

“It’s water shooting out of the ground.”

“And it’s _unpredictable_!”

Jughead shakes his head, a grin stretching across his face. He steps forward, picking up Archie’s hand. “I promise you, Archie, it’s not gonna be that bad. Besides, Old Faithful only erupts every forty-five minutes or something, there’s a chance we won’t even see it go off. Ten minutes, dude, that’s all I’m asking for.”

Archie worries his bottom lip between his teeth, head swiveling on his neck as he finally says, “Fine. Ten minutes, but then we really should get going.”

Jughead crosses his heart with his free hand, “Ten minutes. Got it.”

With their luck- and much to Archie’s dismay, Old Faithful erupts after two minutes of standing there. Jughead laughs when Archie jumps a foot in the air, startled by the sound. Archie grumps the entire walk back to the car.

“It wasn’t funny.”

“No,” Jughead says, still chuckling, “But the older lady who gasped after you said _son of a bitch ass_ was.”   

Archie rolls his eyes, tossing Jughead the keys. “You’re driving.”

“Fair. I love you.”

_“You better.”_

///

**June 12 th:**

“You know, if you had told me that Montana still gets cold even in June, I would have recommended that we go somewhere else.”

The boys are in their tent. After a full day of hiking, with plenty of stops so that Jughead can take pictures, Archie and Jughead are wiped out. They set up camp right at the edge of the woods, near the entrance, so they don’t have the luxury of having trees to act as a shield from the wind that’s appeared mostly out of nowhere.

“It’s not that bad, Jug.”

“It’s freezing.”

“It’s forty degrees.”

“That’s _cold!_ You’re the one who’s a walking space heater.”  

Archie shakes his head. He looks at where Jughead is wrapped up under his sleeping bag, then gets an idea. “Here- get up, I wanna try something.”

Archie lays his sleeping bag out first, then the spare blanket that they brought, then pulls his own sleeping bag over the top of himself and Jughead. Jughead just lays there for a minute, not actually saying anything.

“Better?”

“I guess,” Jughead grumbles. “But you’re too far away from me.”

“…there’s like six inches of space between us.”

“I know. C’mere.”

Archie scoots closer until himself and Jughead are pressed hip to hip, then rolls onto his side so that he can snake his arm across Jughead’s waist. Archie hooks his chin over Jughead’s shoulder asking, “Better now?”

“Best of all, actually.”

Archie sighs, relaxing into the makeshift bed. It’s not very late, but he feels like he could fall asleep right now. He’s nearly there, eyes slipping shut on their own accord when Jughead pipes up and says:

“October is getting closer.”

“Jughead-.”

“I know, I know we agreed on no death talk but- I’m just trying to be realistic here. Make the most of things, you know? It’s only three months and some odd change, and that’s not even a guarantee. I’m like a walking ticking time bomb.”

_I have a grenade for a boyfriend with no control over the hairpin. Lucky me._

Before Archie can stop himself from saying it he goes: “Do you think it’s gonna hurt?”

Jughead shrugs, “I don’t know… probably. I hope not.”

“For your sake, I hope you don’t feel a thing.”

Jughead shifts so that he can look Archie right in the eye. “If I could go like this- with you, holding me- it wouldn’t be the worst thing. Not by a long shot.”   

///

**June 14 th:**

Archie’s packing up the last of the camping gear into the back of the truck, trying to remember how they got it all to fit before. Once he gets the last of it tied down, Archie turns back to where Jughead is, still taking pictures of all the scenery.

“Hey, Juggie, c’mon. We should head out before they charge us for an extra day.” Archie calls, wiping his hands on his jeans. When Jughead doesn’t respond, Archie walks over to where he is, placing a hand on Jughead’s shoulder.

Jughead has a notably discouraged look on his face.

“What is it? What’s the matter?”

Jughead shakes his head in disbelief. “Am I crazy?”

Archie tilts his head to the side.

“I’m not ready to go.”

Archie drops his hand from Jughead’s shoulder, saying, “Believe me… I don’t think any of us are.”

///

**June 17 th:**

The plan is to go back home exactly the way they came, that way they hit any of the spots that they may have missed on the way there. Driving home feels daunting in a way- like they’re headed towards the unexpected; but then again, isn’t everyone?

Archie has his feet up on the dashboard, sending a text to his dad. He and Jughead are about to cross the Nebraska state line; they should be home by the end of the week if everything goes according to plan.

“D’you wanna make a detour?” Jughead asks from the driver’s seat, nudging Archie’s leg.

“Hm?”

Jughead points toward a road sign; Kansas City is one hundred and eighty-seven miles away. That would add an extra day of driving to their trip at the least.  

“We could make a detour, finally see what all the hype is about regarding the barbecue. What do you think?”

Archie contemplates the idea. It would be fun to see Kansas City, but they’ve gone a while. Archie is starting to miss his bed more than he misses his dog- which is something he didn’t even think was possible. At the same time, he’s anxious to get home already; he keeps worrying that something is going to happen to Jughead while they’re-

“Let’s not,” Archie says in a rush. “I know you want to, but we’re already cutting it close on money for gas. We probably shouldn’t risk it.”

“Fair enough,” Jughead replies, never once taking his eyes off the road; he won’t come right out and say it, but Archie knows that he’s disappointed.

He wishes that they had more time for everything, too.  

///

**June 20 th:**

Their last stop before coming home is a camping grounds in Greendale, less than two hours from home; it’s one that Archie and Jughead always talked about going to as kids. It’s not as big or as grand as the other campsites they went to, but it’s just as good- plenty to do and more than enough places to take pictures.

In the morning, before they're supposed to leave, Archie wakes up alone in the tent- not an unusual occurrence- Jughead almost always wakes up before him. The sun nearly blinds him when he unzips the flap on the tent; the fire pit they set up last night is still smoking. Jughead must have just put it out… where the hell is he anyway?

Archie kicks a rock on his way out the tent, looks down only to realize that said rock is holding down Jughead’s beanie and a piece of notebook paper. In Jughead’s scraggly handwriting the paper reads _gone swimming_.   

He pockets the note, then picks up Jughead’s hat and tosses it into the tent. Jughead would never let him live it down if something bad ever happened to that hat.

Jughead has his back-facing Archie when he finally makes it down to the fishing dock. He turns over his shoulder at the sound of Archie’s flip flops smacking against the wood. It’s been a while since he saw Jughead without his beanie on.

"Hi,” Jughead says, quietly.

“Hey, good morning… what are you doing down here?”

“Just thinking… I had an idea, for something we could try.”

Archie feels the hair on his neck stand on end. “Oh? What kind of idea?”

“It’s kind of odd- and I know you’re gonna hate it- but what if-.”

Jughead gets cut off by Archie phone ringing in his pocket; he forgot it was even on. Betty’s smiling face lights up the screen.

“Betty’s calling me. I should see what she needs- give me two minutes? Then we can try whatever idea you have, okay?”

“Sure thing,” Jughead says. “I’ll be here.”

Archie nods, waits until he’s away from the water before hitting answer. “Hey, Betty- what’s up?”

_“I hadn’t heard from you in a couple days, I just thought I would check in- you guys are coming home today, right?”_

“Yeah, yeah we should be back sometime this afternoon.”

_“Good- how’s Jughead? Is he enjoying himself?”_

“I think so, I think he’s mostly bummed that the trips already over, you know? It’ll be good to be home though- I think I’m actually getting tired of diner food.”

_“Is that even possible?”_

“I don’t know,” Archie stops when he hears a loud splash come from behind him; he can’t see Jughead standing at the dock anymore. “Hey, Betty, I should go- I’ll have Jughead text you when we get on the road, alright?”

_“Sure thing. See you later, Arch.”_

“Bye, Betty.”

Archie hangs up, then cranes his neck around, trying to look for Jughead as he walks back towards the water.

“Jug? Hey, man, where are you at?” He calls. As he finally gets to the dock again, the last thing that Archie is expecting to see is Jughead’s crossed ankles at the other end of the dock and nothing else. A closer look and Archie’s heart skips at the realization of what’s going on.

Jughead is holding himself underwater.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Jughead tries to drown himself at the very end. Don't hate me too much for that- see you Sunday!


	11. June/August

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's nothing I can say about this that wont absolutely spoil it so... here's the last chapter.

**June 20 th, early morning:**

Pulling Jughead out the water is a no brainer for Archie. He scrambles forward, falling to his knees next to Jughead’s feet and reaches into the murky water until he finds Jughead’s hands and arms. He’s practically a dead weight in Archie’s grip.

“C’mon, Jughead.” Archie grunts. “Don’t do this- not now.”

Archie pulls and pulls until Jughead is out of the water, and lying flat on his back, splayed out on the wood of the dock. He’s pale in the face and- the once bright blue seventeen in the center of his chest has turned black.

“No, no no no.” Archie whines. The next thing he knows, he’s desperately pushing on the center of Jughead’s chest, trying to get his heart to start beating again like it’s supposed to. Archie just barely remembers to tilt Jughead’s head back and breathe into his mouth.

_I can’t go home without him. I can’t do any of this without him._

His arms burn from the exertion and it hasn’t even been a whole minute. He’d call for help if he thought anyone was actually listening- there’s no way anyone could hear him from all the way out here.

_Shit. How long was Jughead underwater before I got to him? Why isn’t this working? Why won’t he just open his eyes and fucking look at me._

Archie’s hands slip on Jughead’s wet chest, then slip again a few seconds later- he’s losing his grip, he can’t keep going- but he can’t let Jughead go, not like this. His eyes are burning with tears as he grabs Jughead by the chin, not caring that Jughead can’t hear him.

“I, _am not_ , leaving here without you. You got that, Jughead?” Archie yells; tears are streaming down his face. “S-So open your eyes. Open your eyes and look at me, dammit… just breathe Jughead, _C’MON_.”

Nothing happens. Just stillness. Just the breeze blowing through the trees and the water rippling around him. Archie sits back on his haunches, feeling like he can’t even breathe. It’d be funny if this wasn’t the worst moment of his entire life. He covers his eyes with his hands- gasping for breath as he- wait, no, that’s not coming from him.

A cough from in front of him snaps Archie’s head up in a second.

Jughead is still flat on his back, trying to cough up the water that’s sitting in his lungs; he’s wheezing like a stuck pig.

“Oh my god, _Jughead_.” Archie yelps, rushing forward to roll him on his side.

Jughead keeps choking, brown lake water spilling out of his mouth; Archie doesn’t take his hands off him for even a second. He keeps breathing heavy as he lies on his back again but at least he’s breathing. Jughead’s eyes are glossy and bloodshot as he looks up at Archie.

“Hi,” he rasps.

It’s Archie’s turn to choke. “Hi? You just fucking died on me and you’re gonna say _hi?_ ”

“You’re mad.”

“Of course, I’m mad! What the hell were you thinking? I-.”

Archie falters, confused. He looks down at the Jughead’s chest, a bright light having caught his eye.

The black number seventeen shifts on Jughead’s chest, moving to the left. Archie watches with rapt attention as a new blue light appears spinning and spinning for what feels like a lifetime until it halts at- eighty-one. Jughead is going to be eighty-one years old.

He looks up at Jughead again in disbelief.

“What the hell did you do?”

Jughead pants. “You nev- never s-said anything about loopholes, right?”

Archie’s head goes blank at the realization. He did it. He cracked the system. Jughead is going to _live_.

“…you’re a fucking idiot. Come up here and kiss me.”

Archie leans over, holding the back of Jughead’s head with both hands, still dripping with water and brings him to his mouth; Jughead’s own hands cover Archie’s, stretching up as far as he can. Both of them taste like lake water and dirt, but they don’t care- they’re too busy being relieved.

Jughead pulls back first, fingers wrapped around Archie’s wrist.

“It’s not on.”

“What?”

“The bracelet. It’s not on, you’re not wearing it.”

Archie looks down and sure enough, it’s _gone_. It must have come off at some point when he wasn’t paying attention. Maybe it’s in the water somewhere, sitting at the bottom of the lake. Maybe it’s in the mess of the truck. Or, maybe it’s lost in one of the thousands of miles they traveled in the two weeks since he last looked at it.

Archie huffs lightly, shaking his head as he goes: “I don’t care about the bracelet. I just need _you_.”

///

**Flash forward, fourteen months.**

**August 16 th (move-in day):**

“The trucks fully packed,” Fred says. “Is that everything, Archie?”

“Yeah, think so.” Archie shuts the bed of the truck, turning back towards the house. There’s an odd feeling in his chest that he can’t place. “Huh. I thought this day would feel different.”

“Different? How so?”

“I’m not sure- more final, I guess? Things turned out in ways I hadn’t expected.”

“Cause of Jughead?”

Archie nods, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he faces Fred. “I really thought that we’d be doing this together. Now that we’re not- I don’t know. It’ll just take some getting used to, that’s all.”

“Are you gonna be okay? Doing this on your own?”

“Yeah, yeah I think so.”

He and Jughead had talked about going to college together for the longest time. Then, with everything that happened last year, plans changed, conversations needed to be had. In the end, everything worked out for the best.

“The sun’s gonna be going down soon- is Jughead all ready to go?”

“He should be.” Archie turns back to the house, calling through the open front door. “Jug? Are you good to go?”

Jughead comes marching down the steps a few seconds later, phone in hand. “Yeah, sorry- Betty called me.”

“Did she and Veronica make it to Columbia okay?”

“Yep, already unpacked and everything; those two really are a force to be reckoned with.”

“Good; I wouldn’t expect anything else from them.”

The plan is two years of community college, then move to New York if both Archie and Jughead are ready. Jughead had been accepted into Greendale’s community college while Archie has already signed up for some classes at Riverdale’s campus.

After what happened that day at the dock, the two of them had agreed that maybe a little bit of distance wouldn’t be the worst thing. Long distance relationships are hard, sure, but Greendale isn’t too far from Riverdale; Jughead can always come home for long weekends if he wants to.

After he’d turned eighteen, Jughead hadn’t been able to stay with the Welch’s any longer- much as they wanted to, they couldn’t afford to house him without the extra income each month. Fred had been more than willing to let Jughead move in, it was practically a no brainer. Archie had been over the moon in excitement.

“Mr. A, I hope you don’t mind- I left some of my books in the hall closet upstairs, I couldn’t get them all to fit.”

“It’s alright,” Fred assures him. “Who knows, maybe Archie will open one of them up one of these days.”

“Hey- right here!” Archie exclaims; Fred and Jughead laugh playfully.

Fred pats his son on the shoulder, “I’ll give you guys a minute. Jughead, take care of yourself, alright? Don’t be getting’ into too much trouble out there, alright?”

“I’ll try not to. Thanks, Mr. Andrews, really.”

Fred squeezes Jughead’s arm as he goes inside; Jughead rounds the truck, standing in front of Archie.

“You know, you really don’t have to give me your truck, Arch.”

“I want you to have it,” Archie tells him. “You’re gonna need something to get around town in. Besides, Dad and I were talking about going down to the old lot and picking out an old jalopy or something, fix it up and stuff. It’ll be funny to see the look on Betty’s face when I tell her we fixed up a car without needing her help.”

Both of them laugh; Jughead lets his head fall back, his eyes falling shut.

“Yeah, that would be a sight to see.” Jughead turns on his heel, surveying the neighborhood, a pondering look on his face.

“What is it?”

“Nothing, just… thought I’d never see this day.”

“Cause of everything that happened last year?”

After Archie had saved Jughead at the dock in the camping grounds, it had taken Archie two weeks to stop being mad at Jughead. Sure, it had worked, but Archie was still livid. They had fought practically the whole drive home.

_“You could have died, Jughead!”_

_“I know, Archie, I did! That was the idea.”_

_“No, you could have stayed dead! What if I hadn’t come back at the right time, huh? What if I hadn’t been able to save you, then what? Then I would have been left to drive your lifeless body home in the backseat? Did you even think about how this could have gone wrong?”_

The fight hadn’t been very productive, to say the least.

“No, not cause of that,” Jughead says, leaning against the truck. “I mean, the temporary impending doom certainly didn’t help but- people like me, with this background- our lives are more or less decided for us. Being in foster care, having parents that have more or less checked out, people with this kind of family life don’t usually get the chance to do stuff like going to college or even moving out… I got lucky, as weird as it sounds.”

Archie nods, listening with rapt attention; he hadn’t thought about all of that before now.

Jughead shifts to face Archie, linking their fingers together. “I’m glad that I’m here… I’m glad that you didn’t give up on me. Most of the people in my life haven’t even gotten that far.”

“I would never give up on you, Jughead.”

“I know- why do you think I like you so much?”

Archie laughs lightly before reaching for Jughead’s waist, pulling him close. Jughead’s arms come around Archie’s neck, the same way that they always do; Archie nestles his face into Jughead’s collarbone. A weird part of him never wants to let go, a part of him still worries that something bad is going to happen if he lets Jughead out of his sight for more than two seconds.

Without bothering to look around, Archie pulls back and goes straight for Jughead’s mouth, kissing him with intent. It reminds him of their first kiss on New Year's- God, that feels like a lifetime ago now- the way Jughead’s mouth moves against Archie’s is sweet and familiar, everything that Archie already misses about him.

Jughead steps back after a minute, and his bright eyes shine back at Archie, just like they always have.

“I’m really gonna miss you, Jug.”

“Don’t worry, Archie. I’ll come back.”

“Yeah… you always do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Might come back later and fuck around with the format but that's all for now! Thanks for being such great readers!

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts? Questions? Concerns? Let me know!
> 
> Thanks for reading my fic! Comments/Kudos are appreciated and encouraged. You can find me on tumblr as archieandrewsprotectionsquad, come scream at me about the show any time you want. Thanks again for reading, have a great day!


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